Sunday, June 6, 2010

TWB's Q-and-A-Palooza: Good to Be Back

Your SummerSlam Smackdown Main Event?

The mailbag is back after a week off. Another light but satisfying one. Let's dive right in with a quartet of questions from KoppoKick:

1) Looking ahead to SummerSlam, what matches should be the headliner for both Raw and Smackdown on The Hottest Night of the Summer?

RAW seems academic. John Cena vs. Sheamus, and my guess is the Big Ginger Ghost is going to be Champion. They're making a big deal out of Cena never having pinned Sheamus. I think if they're smart, SummerSlam is the time they pull the trigger on that.

As for Smackdown, I'm not so sure Jack SWAGGAH~! makes it to the big dance as World Champion. I'm wondering if they're going to run with Punk/Mysterio as the title program. They could do a lot with the title by the time SummerSlam rolls around, but right now, with Undertaker hurt and no other real main event bank in terms of superstars, you go with the hot feud. Can they draw out Mysterio/Punk until SummerSlam? Yeah, they'll have to take a break on it for now though. Maybe Punk wins the title at Fatal 4-Way and feuds with, say, Christian or Kane.

After the jump...2. Looking ahead to Bound For Glory, what are the Top 3 matches TNA should be booking towards in the 4 months leading up to that show? Is Hogan vs. Sting a given?

It should be, actually. You've heard the same rumblings I have, they want to do Hogan/Abyss at some point, but that would be asinine. Hogan works best as a special attraction, and there's no one on the roster that carries any kind of mystique for Hogan right now other than Jeff Jarrett, possibly AJ Styles and of course, the Stinger. Since Jarrett's a face and Styles need more protection, Hogan/Sting is academic.

As for the other two big feuds, I'd definitely go with RVD vs. Desmond Wolfe for the title. They gotta pull the trigger on Wolfe sooner rather than later. TNA's in a position where they need to build new stars quick. While the WWE can take their time with pushing along Evan Bourne, Kofi Kingston and the like (although with the injuries and retirements, time isn't so much a friend for them anymore), TNA can't afford to keep pushing Wolfe and others like giant walking punchlines.

The sub-main event should be AJ Styles as a heel taking on Pope D'Angelo Dinero with a face Ric Flair as his manager. Forget what the Impact Zone tells you; they're marks to the highest degree and are no barometer of how a guy is over. Flair can work as a face, and he needs to... Styles needs to break from him and be his own man. He's constantly someone's little buddy, and he's a guy who doesn't need that role his whole career. Dinero is a guy that I'm not as high on, but there's no doubt that a lot of people gravitate towards him, so hey, whatever works. TNA needs stars. Dinero fits the bill.

3. Where would you rank Dixie Carter on a list of most influential females in pro wres history?

To tell the honest truth, not very high at all. She's just a money mark, and a stupid one at that. She lets people use her. I can name like 10 or more women more influential than she is right off the bat... Linda McMahon, Stephanie McMahon, Mildred Burke, Fabulous Moolah, Megumi Kudo, Akira Hokuto, Georgeann Maukroupolos, Jaguar Yokota, Trish Stratus... hell, Dixie's own Knockouts probably hold more sway than she does. I doubt she has or had any input in their influence, and they're doing more to establish legitimacy for women's wrestling than any WWE Diva Champion ever could. Sorry.

4) f/m/k: ODB, Rosie Lottalove & Michelle McCool

For those who don't know, f/m/k = fuck/marry/kill

Aaaaanyway, f = ODB, m = Rosie Lottalove, k=Michelle McCool

I'd take my chances with ODB because of the implants, but odds are, she'd end up fucking me with her penis. Rosie's a good candidate for marriage because if she's that big, she can probably cook, and McCool's in the "kill" category because if I fucked her, she'd probably give my dick rash from rubbing up against her skeletal frame. Seriously, she needs to eat a cheeseburger or six.

Those who hate/dislike/not approve of the Kaval-LayCool pairing. Are they:

A) Racist?
B) Hate Puppies?
C) Not a fan of the color Blue?
D) All of the Above?

bpc532 (Chikara101 Poster)

A and B, probably. The thing is, I hate the LayCool act as much as anyone else, but this has the same potential as Miz/Daniel Bryan to produce entertaining segments and to get Low-Ki/Kaval over the way Bryan is over now. I mean, it's the syndrome of a wrestling fan to hate on something that isn't tailored to their idea of what wrestling should be like before it has a chance to breathe. It's a huge reason why I hate the Internet sometimes.

/biting the hand that feeds him

A bunch from Russel Harder:

1) Bret Hart as the Raw GM... it's better then Abraham Washington, right? I mean the best thing about him left the building when Tony Atlas was released.

Way better than Abraham Washington. Like, it'd be jumping from Krusty-brand Imitation Gruel (9 our of 10 orphans can't tell the difference) to filet mignon.

2) Bret Hart running the show (and I say this with Hart as my all-time favorite), does it make any sense at all? Save for the money it will no doubt bring for the first while.

Despite the fact that I'm also an old-school Hitman mark, I question the decision, not because of the name or what have you, but because Bret has kinda lost his edge on how to cut a promo. He seems lost out there at times. His delivery is off. I mean, yeah, he was never the strongest promo, but he could deliver something believable and that could sell the storyline. Now... well... it's a shame I'll say.

3)Does Sheamus step up to take Batista's place?

I think he already has!

4) Heath Slater or Skip Sheffield? Who gets brought in first?

If there's a God, it'll be Skip Sheffield. Maybe it's my personal bias, but I think Sheffield has a long career ahead of him, even if it's just spouting off his corny but genuine and likeable catchphrase, playing comedic foil to anyone and everyone he gets a chance to work for. Slater isn't terrible, but he seems to be the definition of mediocre.

5) What is the top belt in CHIKARA? I've been trying to figure out how the titles structure works in that pro-wrestling fun house.

If you can believe it, the Campeonatos de Parejas. Tag team wrestling and stable-based action is the basis of mostly everything important in the fed. The Young Lions Cup is nice, but it's nowhere near as important. However, I'd argue that the King of Trios tourney title is more prestigious than either of the regularly-defended titles.

6) If you had to trade one person from ROH to the WWE and one person from WWE to ROH, who would they be? Same idea for CHIKARA, but TWO people both ways... and a different WWE person then the one you used for the ROH one-to-one trade.

ROH and WWE? Interesting. Claudio Castagnoli goes to the WWE, no questions asked, any bad blood or reasoning why he was let go the first time forgotten, and to replace him in ROH, I'd probably pick Primo Colon. They obviously have nothing in mind for him now that his brother would rather take painkillers than have gainful employment. I always thought he was the more talented brother anyway. He could go to ROH and have fun maches with Christopher Daniels, Austin Aries and the like.

Chikara and WWE is even more interesting. I dunno, I'd probably swap out 2.0, who have the most ready-made WWE personalities and charisma, for the Dudebusters, who could use some time in Chikara to help find themselves and really have fewer boundaries to work their comedic stylings.

With proper seasoning (ie, more ring time) do you see David Otunga being a potential cash cow?

Seth Silveria

Sorry, but no :)

How long until we get to see The Miz get his fucking head kicked in?

Billy Dunlevy

Well, he didn't get his justice on RAW, but methinks that feud is far from over. Hopefully, Bryan has a few stiff kicks left in him. Of course, now that Miz is a NXT Pro again, and we have Kaval amongst the rookies, well, new possibilities for having heads kicked in will arise.

How do you think the WWE is handling bringing Bryan Danielson/Daniel Bryan into a full-time spot on the main roster? Also, would you have done things differently up to this point? If so, what

Matt Glass

I think they're doing a fine job, actually. Sure, I probably would have done things somewhat differently, but that's because I have a different thought process than other people, but honestly, what they've done so far is effective.

Daniel Bryan vs Miz and Cole - Is this the best thing on WWE TV all year long?

James Varga

Possibly. It's the best thing going right now, but there was some really good stuff going on with Batista transforming from heel to SUPERDOUCHEBAGAWESOMEHEEL. Seriously the WWE's MVP for the first half of the year has been Batista, and it's not terribly close. Still, it's a great angle.

Richie Danko with two:

1) With some obvious choices out of the gate for the internet marks, do you think the E will go the route of the first season and tear down Low-Ki for his size?

I think they're telegraphing something of that order by putting him with LayCool, but he'll get put over in the long run. I think he might shine brighter in Season 2 than Bryan did Season 1 because from what I'm hearing, it's Kaval, Joe Henning Mike McGillicutty, Percy Watson and really no one else. In Season 1, everyone except David Otunga had at least one redeeming quality.

2) With the finale in the books, does it amount to a success in your books?

Yes, in that the right guy won and they made a star out of Daniel Bryan in the process. However, they did a lot of stuff wrong. They rushed a lot of things, the challenges didn't realize nearly the amount of potential they could have, and by the end, the concept of the Pros being on the show too was thrown to the wayside carelessly and lazily. Sadly, the formula's probably not going to change with NXT's future up in the air, but hey, at least we got Wade Barrett and Bryan out of the deal.

A bunch of questions from Down Under from Ross Fynmore:

1) How would you book Jay Lethal in the short to medium term?

I would continue to book him as a nuisance to Flair until Flair went face after being booted from the Neo-Horsemen by AJ. Then, Flair's resistance could include Lethal as well as Pope.

2) Evan Bourne's push. Discuss :P


Err... I think it's a good idea to push Bourne because he's generally exciting, but isn't a one-dimensional spotfest. As to whether this is a real push or not? Well, there's no doubt in my mind that after Extreme Rules, he'll be back facing off against midcarders, but hopefully, it's with the US Title in the balance or against other guys they're giving significant screen-time to, e.g. Ted DiBiase. But just in case you're thinking this could be a Kofi Kingston elevation (in that it's not an elevation at all), just remember this. Even if Bourne doesn't stay in the main event (and by all rights he shouldn't after ER), John Cena, Randy Orton and most importantly, Triple H all like him, so I think his future in the company is pretty bright.

3) Lisa Marie Varon... Too old for a WWE return?

Too old? Eh, I don't think anyone's too old, even Divas, and the right plastic surgery could get her back in WWE Diva "shape" (have to roll my eyes when typing that, ugh). And yeah, with Mickie James creepering herself out of the company and Beth Phoenix on the injured list, the WWE could use the former Victoria, but will they? She left TNA because she commanded too much money. The WWE, although not hurting for cash, might see her as not worth the price-tag when they could just throw in one of the FCW women for much less money.

4) Will Sting ever work for Vince?

He's held out this long. I can't see why he'd crack now. Then again, Vince has gotten some pretty surprising names to work for him, and I'm sure the dream match between Sting and Undertaker at WrestleMania could be had for the right price...

5) If you could give one piece of advice to Dixie Carter, what would it be?

Cut ties with Vince Russo completely.

6) Is Bret Hart relevant anymore in this day and age?

Absolutely. The WWE has done a great job at making him seem like a big deal to the fans who might not remember him (i.e. the kids). As a GM or a revenge-against-VKM-minded grey wolf, he's certainly relevant. As a guy beating the Miz, even with shenanigans, though? I'll cop to him not being THAT relevant. Still, though, it's great to see the Hitman on WWE TV again.

7) How would you revitalize Kane's career?

By beating his "brother", clean, in the middle of the ring, as a culmination to a hot angle.

8) Top 3 you would put in a dead pool competition.

Mae Young, Scott Hall and Sean Waltman

9) Who will be the next star to jump ship?

From where to where though? The obvious answer is Homicide, but it'll probably be back to ROH rather than to the WWE. I still wouldn't be surprised to see Samoa Joe in a WWE ring sooner rather than later though.

10) Glassing in TNA.... Too far?

I'm assuming "glassing" = blading, and I always seem to get this question. TNA doesn't get that blood is a good thing to be used sparingly, not every week. ROH has the right idea. The Generico/Cabana vs. Steen/Corino feud has been blood-soaked, but it fits the narrative since in storyline, the two factions hate each other with the fire of a thousand suns. As for the other stuff? Blading is sparing, as it should be.

11) Jericho as a talk show host... In your unbiased opinion, how will that work out for him?

Depends on the outlet. I think Jericho's got awesome charisma and would make a great talk show host, but sometimes, the best talk shows fail because of reasons other than the charisma of their host. I mean, look at Conan. Someone like you or me might think that he's leagues better than Jay Leno, but when he took over for Leno, he inherited his audience, which liked Leno and didn't connect with Conan. So yeah, I think he can be a great talk show host, but I'm not sure it's something that'll definitely work out for him.

12) What's with Eric Young?

He's a mediocre talent who's being given the rub of his life from Kevin Nash.

13) Favorite Booker?


No, in all seriousness, Paul Heyman, who had two separate awesome runs in two different companies. Just keep him away from the checkbook.

14) Winner of NXT 2 is....

The obvious answer is Mike McGillicutty. The smark stock answer is Kaval. My answer is Percy Watson. Dark horse, ton of personality. Besides, the two former don't really need to win NXT to get over. Watson might.

If any character from your favorite book, movie or television series could come to life and then hang out with you for a week, who would you pick and why?

Butch Rosser

Everyone would expect me to say Ben Linus, and it'd be a good guess, but I'd just get the feeling that he'd end up conning me out of my house and making me think it was my idea to hand my life over to him.

So, with that in mind, I'm gonna say Tony Stark. He's rich, knows how to have a good time, and there's an outside shot that I'd get to wear some Iron Man armor if I got him drunk enough.

Closing out the mailbag with two from blog commenter trnesu, courtesy of Formspring:

1) Should John Cena's bumps into the ring steps be elevated to signature move status for him? Everyone hits the steps, but he launches into them with so much force I fear for the first three audience rows.

I never really noticed that before, but now that you mention it, yeah, he's always taking a bump to the steps and those steps FLY. Then again, if Batista throwing him into the steps doesn't launch them into fifth row, I'm not sure any combo will produce that. I think the crowd's safe for now. For now being the operative word. If they change from steel to some kind of plastic step, who knows how far those bad boys are going to get launched into the crowd.

2)Next Monday's Raw, viewer's choice. How about Taker, Mysterio, and Orton in a triple threat cast match. Is it just me or is the injury bug hitting hard?

The WWE has been extremely lucky in the last 18 months with Batista being the only main event guy who suffered a major injury. I guess it's their luck catching up with them now. Then again, look a the three guys who're out. All three have injury histories as long as the Dead Sea Scrolls. Now, if Chris Jericho, Christian, CM Punk and Sheamus all get hurt, then we can start talking about an abnormal injury bug going on.

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