Junk Food Booking

Great match... I don't wanna see it again next week
Photo Credit: WWE.com

For those who've been reading for the last few months, you'd know that I'm on a quest to lose weight. I started out at 336 lbs., but since April, I've dropped 68.5 lbs. This was not by accident. Back when I was a superfatty (before becoming just a fatty, you see), I used to eat at Taco Bell like it was my job. Three times a week at least, maybe more if I was feeling a bit more self-loathing or lazy that day. Yes, it made me feel like twelve lbs. of horse shit in a five lb. bag within a half-hour or so of eating it, but it tasted okay and it was convenient. When I changed my lifestyle, I cut the Taco Bell out of my diet completely, eating mostly home-prepared foods, especially for lunch. I wasn't running to the bathroom an hour after eating anymore. I didn't get stomach cramps. By and large the stuff I was packing had better flavors and were more nutritious for me to boot. I can say, I laid off Taco Bell until about a month or so ago, when on a trip to New England for work, I decided hey, for old time's sake (and because I didn't want to jeopardize missing the beginning of RAW), lemme grab dinner from Taco Bell. I got it, and it was good in a nostalgic sort of way. Also, it didn't send me running to the bathroom either. However, it didn't really have me longing for the days when I ate Taco Bell ad nauseam either.

What does that anecdote have to do with wrestling? Well, if you watched last night's main event to RAW, you might get the idea. Yes, the TLC WWE Championship match between The Miz and Jerry "The King" Lawler last night was what I like to call junk food booking. Let's take it from the top. It was a first-time match between the two opponents and yet they felt the need to make it into a heavily gimmicked match. It featured run ins from a wrestler and an announcer. The heel Champion won by heavy chicanery. On a show that by-and-large featured clean, well-booked finishes, this stood out like a sore thumb. However, it was also one entertaining spectacle of a match.

The problem with junk food booking is, like when junk food food is consumed in excess, really messes with the health of a fed. Case in point, look at the WWF during the Attitude Era or TNA even now. Back then, people got over, but it was on the strength of being great personalities (Rock, Austin, Triple H/DX, McMahon, Foley) given a forum to entertain on the biggest stage. It was also a fresh and exciting concept, but it was one that was ultimately a fad. There were so many talented wrestlers in the WWF who could have gotten over in another era in the past, even if it was just as a midcard attraction, but that never did get their due. Guys like Mark Henry, D'Lo Brown, Val Venis, William Regal and others were given throwaway builds that either had a short-term pop or had none at all, and thus they were tossed to the wayside for varying amounts of times.

In TNA, you can see how well their pseudo-Crash TV style of booking works to get guys over as really no one really garners any true heat (they need to thank God that the Impact Zone is full of Pavlovian dogs/plants that cheer when they want them to cheer) and the ratings and buyrates show no sign of trending upwards for an extended amount of time. They give you stuff like what the WWE gave last night with the main event in every match on every card. That's a recipe for becoming bloated, sickly and just plain unattractive.

While booking super clusterfuck finishes like last night all the time will ruin your fed, having it once in awhile? Yeah, as long as it's entertainingly done, it's alright in moderation. I mean, there was a finish, both guys bumped their asses off (Miz moreso than King, but that's understandable given the ages of the two), there were some huge storyline developments that impact not only the WWE Championship but the state of announcing on RAW and it all felt important, which is something that Vince Russo's scatterbrained clusterfuck booking almost never does. Those are the keys to booking something like that. I think the WWE passed last night with their main event.

I mean yeah, it's great to eat steak and salad and roast chicken all the time, but sometimes, it's that greasy fast food cheeseburger, or in my case, a pile of chalupas from Taco Bell that fit the bill. Last night was one of those occasions. I think it's something that can be let slide for now, as long as the cravings to go back to pigging out every week don't ever come back.

Remember you can contact TH and ask him questions about wrestling, life or anything else. Please refer to this post for contact information. He always takes questions!