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| It's a Henry-centric Tweet-bag! Photo Credit: WWE.com |
First up, @Enrico_Palazzo_ wants me to play some Skynard.
OKAY
Next, Eamon Paton of Wrestlefan Writes is asking me to play interlevel fantasy booking and wants to know which wrestler from the indies I'd select to have a six month feud with Mark Henry.
Okay, either I want a hoss fight or I want an underdog story, right? There are some juicy hoss options in the indies, like Michael Elgin, who is a smaller, whiter, Canadianer version of Henry. There are Uhaa Nation and Willie Mack. Even Jock Samson. But I think there's a better story in six months with a smaller wrestler? A natural underdog, right? I'd go with Gregory Iron, but he's doing really well as a bad guy in AIW. Maybe classic underdog isn't in the cards. Maybe we should go in another direction.
Jojo Bravo? Yeah, Jojo Bravo. Let him really underestimate what it would take to wrestle Henry the first time, get run the fuck over, then go on a campaign to get another match with Henry, who'd keep refusing while wrestling other hosses. The last straw be sneak attacking Henry after a match and finishing it off with a mocking Banzai Drop. Henry would reciprocate with legalized murder, going into the match where Bravo gets the unlikely upset win with the World's Strongest Slam (yes, you read that right). Fill in the details yourself, but yeah, I think that's a good skeleton for a story.
@EricScar68 asks with four TV shows and the "deepest roster" in history, when is enough WWE programming enough?
It would be one thing if WWE made use of that "deep" roster. I've been meaning to blog about this idea for the last week or so, but being busy at work has just caught up to me in a gargantuan way. I don't think having six effective hours of programming is too much for this kind of roster. However, the way WWE uses that roster is the problem. I mean, look at Main Event for the two weeks before last. IT was the same matchup (Antonio Cesaro vs. Ryback) with the same finish. It would be one thing if there was a good story involved there, and in theory, there was. However, they've done the same things on RAW and Smackdown that folks like Brandon Stroud get bouts of post-traumatic stress disorder every time Kofi Kingston and Dolph Ziggler are within a 20 yard radius of each other.
So yeah, with the amount of programming WWE has, they can experiment with their "deep" roster and create a pastiche of different styles rather than a food chain where you're lucky if you get a three-minute exposition against a guy who just got back from Mars. I'm not saying that "it'd get guys over, lol" because I don't know what would get popular with the WWE crowd nowadays anymore. However, I know that it would at least open up some variety and let Justin Gabriel or even JTG be more than just dudes they feed to Ryback when he's hungry (read, between stories).
@OkoriWadsworth wants me to book my own Rey de Voladores with wrestlers from any era.
ELIMINATOR 1: Chris Candido vs. El Generico vs. PAC vs. Low Ki
ELIMINATOR 2: 1-2-3 Kid era Sean Waltman vs. Ultimo Dragon vs. Rey Mysterio, Jr. vs. ACH
From @BrandunKyla, what were my biggest surprises and letdowns from National Pro Wrestling Day?
I'd say the biggest letdown was the R-Pro match, but I didn't have any expectations going into it. As a human being though, yeah, that was the biggest bummer of the whole weekend though. The biggest actual letdown though? I'd say it was the parking fees. If you're going to charge for parking, you let people know ahead of time.
Biggest surprise? Well, I had a feeling that Chiva Kid might be a star performer, so I can't honestly say the CWF match was my biggest pleasant unexpectedness. In the ring, it was probably how absolutely HOSSY Apollyon was. Out of it, and this is totally an ego-boost type of thing, was the number of people told me they were fans of the blog. Not just the people I was there looking to meet up with, but random people who just came up to me, either at merch tables or in the crowd. That always feels good.
More NPWD stuff, @Heinekenrana wants to know whom I want to see from the event at King of Trios.
Team Rey de Voladores: Oliver Grimsley, Chiva Kid, Surfer Mitch Thompson
Yeah, I know, Chiva Kid wasn't in RdV, but he fits the oeuvre. This team to me is more interesting than any promotional emissary for a few reasons. One, Grimsley and Thompson both were guys who showed me something in their eliminator matches, enough that I wanted to see more. Two, even if they didn't make it out of the first round, they'd be there for the rest of the weekend to do other showcase matches. Three, sometimes, the random teams are the best ones.
Pseudo-staffer here at TWB and managing editor of With Leather, Brandon Stroud, asks to rank the Wrestling Bros in this picture, assuming Zia is #1.
I could go with the criterion Brandon laid down. I could go egotistical and say everyone else is tied for #1 behind me. I could go self-deprecating and say I'm in last place. However, in the spirit of fellow Wrestling Bro Casey (aka THE STINGER), everyone in that picture is equal. There is no bourgeois class in the Wrestling Bros. There's no ranking. No one's above anyone else. We are all proletarian brothers and sisters! YES!
@robot_hammer wants to know what the HOSS CRITERIA are.
I hate to say this, but I know one when I see one. Yeah, the old definition of pornography fits, but it's also not a capricious answer. I can't lay down specific criteria, but I will say that there's a marked difference between, say, Mason Ryan, and a true hoss like Mark Henry, right? You'd agree? But I guess the basic ground rules would be that you'd have to be a big dude, have some strength, know how to move around the ring, and not be afraid to throw your weight around. I know, that's such a cop-out answer, but if I laid down rules, I'd end up violating them in my hoss-fandom. So yeah.
Two from @chudleycannons. First, what's the protocol for taking pictures with independent wrestlers?
I dunno. I always just ask and I receive. But I also don't interrupt them when talking to other fans/wrestlers, or if they're busy. Also, if you're going to ask for pictures, don't be stingy with your cash. Try and buy something off someone. Sure, you might not like the merch the guy you're asking for a picture with is selling. But you don't have to buy off them. If you spread the wealth around, then everyone wins.
Second, what are my thoughts on the Wrestling Is streaming service?
I would like it a lot more if SMVOD were doing it and allowed, for a premium monthly rate, to access anything in their library. But it's still a good thing to start.
@lambozilla asks that since there are more women in Japanese wrestling crowds if I think they're better represented in the product.
The joshi tradition has been steeped in Japanese wrestling culture for over three decades. Women over there have more of a reason to believe they can make it to the top of their craft without being reduced to sexy cattle. I don't want to play amateur, generalizing psychologist, but if I were to ask a Japanese woman wrestling fan if she felt well-represented in her fandom, I'd be surprised if she said no. I couldn't say the same for an American.
@DaveMuscarella asks what my favorite cold weather-related gimmick/named wrestler is?
Does "Stone Cold" Steve Austin count? If not, then I guess the answer is going to have to be the Ice Train.
@Kenzaki24 asks what my most and least pleasant parts of this young NHL season have been so far.
Well, the good has been that hockey is back and that folks like @FlyGoalScoredBy have a reason to be funny topically rather than being miserable. The worst thing... I dunno, have you seen the Flyers lately? Talk about stumbling out of the goddamn gate...
@chudleycannons has a third question, what are my three Chikara title match predictions for this weekend?
I don't think Kingston's Grand Championship is on the line here. Unless Kevin Steen is becoming a Chikara regular, I don't see him winning that match anyway. As for the other titles? Saturyne will be a fine Young Lions Cup Champion some day, probably as the winner of the '13 or even '14 tournament, but this isn't her year. The Campeonatos de Parejas, though? Yeah, 3.0 is so taking those titles tomorrow. Of course, I fear that they may only last one or two defenses of them until Jigsaw and The Shard take them sometime in the spring, but hey, better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all, right?
Finally, @el_spriggs wants to know if there's a potentially hossier match than the hypothetical Mark Henry vs. Apollyon match he's putting forward.
Well, while Henry/Apollyon would be quite the juicy hoss fight. In fact, it's so juicy that I long to see it. I LONG TO SEE IT. However, the holy grail of hoss fights? I don't care if the man is in his '50s and gives even negative fucks about pulling his punches nowadays. Mark Henry vs. Vader is the ultimate HOSS FIGHT, even now, and I dare anyone to top it. You can't.
Okay, either I want a hoss fight or I want an underdog story, right? There are some juicy hoss options in the indies, like Michael Elgin, who is a smaller, whiter, Canadianer version of Henry. There are Uhaa Nation and Willie Mack. Even Jock Samson. But I think there's a better story in six months with a smaller wrestler? A natural underdog, right? I'd go with Gregory Iron, but he's doing really well as a bad guy in AIW. Maybe classic underdog isn't in the cards. Maybe we should go in another direction.
Jojo Bravo? Yeah, Jojo Bravo. Let him really underestimate what it would take to wrestle Henry the first time, get run the fuck over, then go on a campaign to get another match with Henry, who'd keep refusing while wrestling other hosses. The last straw be sneak attacking Henry after a match and finishing it off with a mocking Banzai Drop. Henry would reciprocate with legalized murder, going into the match where Bravo gets the unlikely upset win with the World's Strongest Slam (yes, you read that right). Fill in the details yourself, but yeah, I think that's a good skeleton for a story.
@EricScar68 asks with four TV shows and the "deepest roster" in history, when is enough WWE programming enough?
It would be one thing if WWE made use of that "deep" roster. I've been meaning to blog about this idea for the last week or so, but being busy at work has just caught up to me in a gargantuan way. I don't think having six effective hours of programming is too much for this kind of roster. However, the way WWE uses that roster is the problem. I mean, look at Main Event for the two weeks before last. IT was the same matchup (Antonio Cesaro vs. Ryback) with the same finish. It would be one thing if there was a good story involved there, and in theory, there was. However, they've done the same things on RAW and Smackdown that folks like Brandon Stroud get bouts of post-traumatic stress disorder every time Kofi Kingston and Dolph Ziggler are within a 20 yard radius of each other.
So yeah, with the amount of programming WWE has, they can experiment with their "deep" roster and create a pastiche of different styles rather than a food chain where you're lucky if you get a three-minute exposition against a guy who just got back from Mars. I'm not saying that "it'd get guys over, lol" because I don't know what would get popular with the WWE crowd nowadays anymore. However, I know that it would at least open up some variety and let Justin Gabriel or even JTG be more than just dudes they feed to Ryback when he's hungry (read, between stories).
@OkoriWadsworth wants me to book my own Rey de Voladores with wrestlers from any era.
ELIMINATOR 1: Chris Candido vs. El Generico vs. PAC vs. Low Ki
ELIMINATOR 2: 1-2-3 Kid era Sean Waltman vs. Ultimo Dragon vs. Rey Mysterio, Jr. vs. ACH
From @BrandunKyla, what were my biggest surprises and letdowns from National Pro Wrestling Day?
I'd say the biggest letdown was the R-Pro match, but I didn't have any expectations going into it. As a human being though, yeah, that was the biggest bummer of the whole weekend though. The biggest actual letdown though? I'd say it was the parking fees. If you're going to charge for parking, you let people know ahead of time.
Biggest surprise? Well, I had a feeling that Chiva Kid might be a star performer, so I can't honestly say the CWF match was my biggest pleasant unexpectedness. In the ring, it was probably how absolutely HOSSY Apollyon was. Out of it, and this is totally an ego-boost type of thing, was the number of people told me they were fans of the blog. Not just the people I was there looking to meet up with, but random people who just came up to me, either at merch tables or in the crowd. That always feels good.
More NPWD stuff, @Heinekenrana wants to know whom I want to see from the event at King of Trios.
Team Rey de Voladores: Oliver Grimsley, Chiva Kid, Surfer Mitch Thompson
Yeah, I know, Chiva Kid wasn't in RdV, but he fits the oeuvre. This team to me is more interesting than any promotional emissary for a few reasons. One, Grimsley and Thompson both were guys who showed me something in their eliminator matches, enough that I wanted to see more. Two, even if they didn't make it out of the first round, they'd be there for the rest of the weekend to do other showcase matches. Three, sometimes, the random teams are the best ones.
Pseudo-staffer here at TWB and managing editor of With Leather, Brandon Stroud, asks to rank the Wrestling Bros in this picture, assuming Zia is #1.
I could go with the criterion Brandon laid down. I could go egotistical and say everyone else is tied for #1 behind me. I could go self-deprecating and say I'm in last place. However, in the spirit of fellow Wrestling Bro Casey (aka THE STINGER), everyone in that picture is equal. There is no bourgeois class in the Wrestling Bros. There's no ranking. No one's above anyone else. We are all proletarian brothers and sisters! YES!
@robot_hammer wants to know what the HOSS CRITERIA are.
I hate to say this, but I know one when I see one. Yeah, the old definition of pornography fits, but it's also not a capricious answer. I can't lay down specific criteria, but I will say that there's a marked difference between, say, Mason Ryan, and a true hoss like Mark Henry, right? You'd agree? But I guess the basic ground rules would be that you'd have to be a big dude, have some strength, know how to move around the ring, and not be afraid to throw your weight around. I know, that's such a cop-out answer, but if I laid down rules, I'd end up violating them in my hoss-fandom. So yeah.
Two from @chudleycannons. First, what's the protocol for taking pictures with independent wrestlers?
I dunno. I always just ask and I receive. But I also don't interrupt them when talking to other fans/wrestlers, or if they're busy. Also, if you're going to ask for pictures, don't be stingy with your cash. Try and buy something off someone. Sure, you might not like the merch the guy you're asking for a picture with is selling. But you don't have to buy off them. If you spread the wealth around, then everyone wins.
Second, what are my thoughts on the Wrestling Is streaming service?
I would like it a lot more if SMVOD were doing it and allowed, for a premium monthly rate, to access anything in their library. But it's still a good thing to start.
@lambozilla asks that since there are more women in Japanese wrestling crowds if I think they're better represented in the product.
The joshi tradition has been steeped in Japanese wrestling culture for over three decades. Women over there have more of a reason to believe they can make it to the top of their craft without being reduced to sexy cattle. I don't want to play amateur, generalizing psychologist, but if I were to ask a Japanese woman wrestling fan if she felt well-represented in her fandom, I'd be surprised if she said no. I couldn't say the same for an American.
@DaveMuscarella asks what my favorite cold weather-related gimmick/named wrestler is?
Does "Stone Cold" Steve Austin count? If not, then I guess the answer is going to have to be the Ice Train.
@Kenzaki24 asks what my most and least pleasant parts of this young NHL season have been so far.
Well, the good has been that hockey is back and that folks like @FlyGoalScoredBy have a reason to be funny topically rather than being miserable. The worst thing... I dunno, have you seen the Flyers lately? Talk about stumbling out of the goddamn gate...
@chudleycannons has a third question, what are my three Chikara title match predictions for this weekend?
I don't think Kingston's Grand Championship is on the line here. Unless Kevin Steen is becoming a Chikara regular, I don't see him winning that match anyway. As for the other titles? Saturyne will be a fine Young Lions Cup Champion some day, probably as the winner of the '13 or even '14 tournament, but this isn't her year. The Campeonatos de Parejas, though? Yeah, 3.0 is so taking those titles tomorrow. Of course, I fear that they may only last one or two defenses of them until Jigsaw and The Shard take them sometime in the spring, but hey, better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all, right?
Finally, @el_spriggs wants to know if there's a potentially hossier match than the hypothetical Mark Henry vs. Apollyon match he's putting forward.
Well, while Henry/Apollyon would be quite the juicy hoss fight. In fact, it's so juicy that I long to see it. I LONG TO SEE IT. However, the holy grail of hoss fights? I don't care if the man is in his '50s and gives even negative fucks about pulling his punches nowadays. Mark Henry vs. Vader is the ultimate HOSS FIGHT, even now, and I dare anyone to top it. You can't.
