|Best. Postgame. Interview. EVER.|
1. Daniel Bryan (Last Week: 4) - WWE is refunding house shows because he can't appear on them. Choke on that, haters.
2. Richard Sherman (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Sherman is the poster boy for everything I love about pro athletes. I adored Barry Sanders for his electrifying play on the field, but when he just handed the ball to the official after a touchdown, I kinda was slightly disappointed. Then again, that was Sanders' nature. He was a humble dude, but he was exciting in his own way. Sherman is like that on the field too, but goddammit, he's even better off it. He's a pro wrestling personality playing football. And to all those racist shitheads out there who wanna call him a "thug" or "classless" or whatever other coded language is used to denigrate someone for showing emotion? Dude graduated from Stanford with honors, and he's working on a Masters. Ten bucks says half the people muffling the n-word couldn't even get into Stanford.
3. Rachel Summerlyn (Last Week: 3) - This week will be Summerlyn's last on the list. She isn't getting any less awesome, but all signals from her end seem to indicate her career as an in-ring performer is over. I know she'll continue to do great things in the business though - she's too experienced and talented not to lend a hand to certain Austin promotions who run at the Marchesa Theater cough cough - and hey, she'll always be around the Twitters doing her thing. I wouldn't think of this as a demotion. She's more becoming the "Best in the World in Perpetuity" or "Emeritus." You can't just STOP being as fan-fucking-tastic as she is, y'know.
4. Emma Thompson (Last Week: 9) - Not content to let J-Lawr win the photobombing game, Thompson enhanced Lupita Nyong'o's photo op at the Screen Actors Guild Awards last night. I'm gonna have to give the win in this round to Lawrence though, because one, her scowling photobomb was a way better pose, and two, she nailed Taylor Swift, who's way more deserving of a 'bomb than a relatively innocuous actress whose claim to recent fame was being in the powerful (if hard to watch according to most who've seen it) 12 Years a Slave.
5. Hard-boiled Eggs (Last Week: Not Ranked) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED ENTRY - I've resisted them for so long, and then I had one today in my lunch salad. I HAVE BEEN DEPRIVING MYSELF FOR FAR TOO LONG.
6. AJ Lee (Last Week: 2) - I'm excited for a potential Divas Championship match for the first time since Lee took on her once-and-future bestie Kaitlyn (pbuh) last year with this match against Naomi on the horizon. Hopefully, they get whoever's in charge of the women in NXT to lay this story and match out.
7. Mark Henry (Last Week: 5) - I really hope that Henry just shows up to every awards show from here on out and splits every wig for snubbing his salmon coat-aided retirement fakeout. FUCK IT, GIVE HIM A JAMES BEARD AWARD TOO. YOU KNOW MARK HENRY CAN MAKE A PERFECT SOUFFLE WITHOUT COLLAPSING THE STEEPLE.
8. Jennifer Lawrence (Last Week: 1) - Look, I'm not saying acting performances aren't subjective, and that physical beauty isn't in the eye of the beholder. I understand why people might be impatient or dissatisfied with Chikara, or why some meat-eaters might feel a backlash towards bacon. I can even accept them. But backlash against Lawrence? Well, it could be my incredible bias showing. Wait, it is my incredible bias. Still, J-Lawr rules, everyone else drools.
9. Erin Andrews (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Her deadpan "WHO was talking to you?" follow-up to Sherman was outstanding. A small part of her being her is owed to her fashion sense. Look, she's mostly up here because she was the Gene Okerlund to Sherman's Randy Savage (and if you don't think Mean Gene played an integral role in Savage's backstage interviews, you don't know your wrestling history), but I gotta give a nod where a nod is due. That peacoat and scarf combo she was rocking pregame was tight.
10. Sara del Rey (Last Week: 10) - SARA DEL REY FACT: Her smile is registered in 15 states as a deadly weapon.