Friday, March 28, 2014

WrestleMania XXX Countdown: Tag Team Championship Four-Way

Will Jack Swagger be able to separate the Usos from each other long enough to win at Mania?
Photo Credit: WWE.com
WWE Tag Team Championship Fatal Four Way Match
The Usos (c) vs. the Real Americans vs. Los Matadores vs. Curtis Axel and Ryback

How: Axel and Ryback got the shot at the Usos for aiding Kane's assault on The Shield. Presumably, the Real Americans also received their place in the match as a favor from The Authority after their rematch against The Shield didn't go as planned. Los Matadores were added randomly during the last week, probably because they defeated Rybaxel at some point.

The Story: I'm pretty sure I laid out the story of the match in the "How" section. The Usos really don't have much of a beef with any of those four teams, excepting that they're all members of the tag team division, which at times has been hot in the past year.

Then again, tangentially connecting dots leads me to think that the fact the Usos are in there with three other teams stems from certain relationships with former Champions and The Authority. In January, the New Age Outlaws came to the aid of CM Punk against The Shield at Old School RAW. That alliance came to an abrupt end when they bailed on Punk in a trios match later that week on Smackdown. After feuding with Punk in the leadup to the Royal Rumble, the Outlaws got a shot at Cody Rhodes and Goldust, then the Tag Team Champions, after upending them in a non-title match.

The Outlaws won the belts at the Rumble pre-show, and almost immediately were shunted into a feud with the Usos. During their feud, the Usos took any chance they could at humiliating the Outlaws, and finally, the Usos won the titles on RAW in February. The Outlaws backed out of a rematch after it was revealed Road Dogg had an injury, so Los Matadores took their place.

The Outlaws finally revealed themselves to be part of The Authority by coming out with Kane in suits during the beatdown on The Shield last week on RAW. After that event took place, three teams were added to their slate at Mania. PUT TWO AND TWO TOGETHER, SHEEPLE! CHEMTRAILS! BENGHAZI! RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE!

Analysis: This match, which is also a prime candidate to get bumped to the pre-show, has fallen victim to the bloat with which WrestleMania gets afflicted. Once a year, Vince McMahon's heart grows three sizes, and he gets the urge to make sure everyone on the roster gets his or her WrestleMania payday. The problem is that Los Matadores and Rybaxel both are teams that belong nowhere near the Tag Team Championships under normal circumstances. WWE gave Rybaxel a slick in with their reward for partaking in corporately backed chicanery, but wouldn't this match be a far better statement towards the rekindling of the tag team division if the Usos and Real Americans were the only teams fighting?

Still, as much as I dislike multi-man singles matches, multi-team tags never seem to have the same kind of bloat or deus ex machina -caused infirmity for one of the members of the match so that the story doesn't get jumbled. Rybaxel as a team is criminally underrated. Los Matadores? Well, I wish that WWE would take the masks off them, let them be Primo and Epico once more, and have El Torito roam the WWE landscape on his own. Right now, as a group, they falter hugely in the ring for me.

Who Should Win: The only way I think the Usos shouldn't walk out of this event as Tag Team Champions is if the Real Americans aren't splitting up in the aftermath and end up becoming a legit babyface tag team after jettisoning Zeb Colter. Which is to say, I think the Usos should definitely win this match, feud with a bunch of teams before losing the belts to the Ascension at SummerSlam or something like that.

Who Will Win: The Usos will win. Neither Rybaxel nor Los Matadores are over enough to be Tag Champions, and as much as WWE is hesitating on splitting the Real Americans, that team cannot contain the awesome, hossy hero-power of one Antonio Cesaro any longer. Winning the Tag Straps would be a step back for them in terms of storytelling.