Monday, April 28, 2014

The Past is Prologue: Total Divas (S2, Ep. 6)/Legends House (Ep. 2) NON POWER RANKINGS?

Pictured above are two of the reasons Trey just wasn't feelin' Total Divas this week
Photo Credit:
 Yes, I just decided that I'm not going to go for an arbitrary list here, so one of my main writing crutches has been proverbially kicked out from under myself. Instead, I'm going to talk about the weird coalescence that both Total Divas and Legends House have in their 6th and 2nd episodes of the year respectively. Weirdly, it more links to the beginning of Total Divas' run this year than its current point of spending gobs of time pretending Ariane is a likable person. Around the second episode was the beginning of the rift between Nattie and Summer Rae. We were given no real reason for why this was, other than "ugh new people" or whatever. The same occurred this week with Tony Atlas and basically everybody, although there is a more guided understanding as to why. Old people don't like talking. That's the reason, I guess.

Still, it exposes a young period for Legends House that they are just barely in the feeling out process in terms of stories. Honestly, that is the best time for any reality TV show. A reality show that gives a shit about its storylines is a reality show that is getting substantially worse. Take Total Divas for instance! The bloom has been off the rose for this show for a long time. I watch it on the realization that I would rather deal with these stories versus Todd Chrisley blurting out Southern belle colloquialisms, but the stories are getting harder to defend in terms of interest. Tonight's show had Nattie be upset for reasons of "dude, we don't ever just fuck in places" or something like that. Ariane finally evolved into the most annoying person ever from her previous evolution of happy funk cheerleader. Also, Brie Bella evolved into the most annoying animal rights crusader in history.

It's a wonder I even watch this any more, other than feeling like I should give something to the fine readers of this blog in terms of the goofier parts of WWE's entertainment empire (which is still a funny thing to say, namely because suddenly that old mistress known as pro wrestling doesn't look nearly as ridiculous in comparison to an old dude babbling about silent movies). It's hard not to throw in the towel on basic things that do not hold a deeper meaning, or could be read as a deeper narrative to be scoffed at, or really are just dumb things happening on television.

Then again, I don't know. Some weeks I'm just not up for reality television antics, but maybe it is just to cleanse the palette of last week's double whammy of being bummed about the problems of others. Now the problems of others are insignificant and silly! Letting cats go missing! Talking way too much in a manner that suggests you haven't had many intimate conversations! Pushup bras! I'm going to swallow some cough syrup and forget this ever happened. No lists. Summer Rae wasn't even on the episode. Oh, they said "pussy" twice on television by getting away with the double entendre. So there. That's two reality shows. Also Tony Atlas talked to a horse. And ate it.