Photo Credit: Erik Dixon
1. Heidi Lovelace (Last Week: 3) - She did what everyone thought she could do and won the Young Lions Cup by not only defeating Missile (!) Assault (!) Ant (!), but overcoming interference from the other two pests outside the ring. She has to hope that her first defense is against Worker Ant or one of the other C:XF goons or else all her ant-training will have been for just one match.
2. Sasha Banks (Last Week: 2) - It looked as if she was wearing Charlotte's "Do it with Flair" shirt as psychological warfare until it was discovered that she had the "with Flair" covered up with "like a BOSS." ONE OF US! ONE OF US!
3. Grumpy Cat (Last Week: 4) - Did you know Grumpy Cat is worth over $100M? To quote modern day scribe Mark Henry, "That cat rich as hell."
4. Bayley (Last Week: 8) - One could say she showed more guts than brains coming out to step to Banks with a brace on her knee, but isn't the heart of a Champion what everyone wants? Bayley's a warrior, man, a warrior!
5. Meatballs (Last Week: Not Ranked) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED ENTRY - Not many things in this world are better than homemade meatballs with a pot of gravy and some pasta. Oh man, oh man, oh man, and they're even good leftover or cold.
6. "Smooth Sailing" Ashley Remington (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Remington is REVOLUTIONIZING wrestling with sportsmanship and fruit baskets. Between him and Jervis Cottonbelly spreading Gentlemania, maybe wrestling will become a nicer, more sporting place after all.
7. Kimber Lee (Last Week: Not Ranked) - I have nothing to back this up, but she went to the Eagles/Seahawks game to cheer on her beloved hometown visitors, and the home team got thumped. Coincidence? Well, if they rematch in the playoffs, let's all make sure she's not there to ruin the Eagles getting their revenge, okay?
8. Fletcher Cox (Last Week: 6) - Speaking of the Eagles game, sure, the team got thumped, but Cox still played out of his mind. One of these days, he's going to go so hard that he'll rip a quarterback in half and end up doing 20 to life at Riker's Island. But it'll be worth if that QB is Tim Tebow... hahaha sike, Tim Tebow is never playing another down in the NFL again, and for all his sanctimony, he actually did something really cool by paying off folks' Christmas presents on layaway. Respect.
9. KJ McDaniels (Last Week: Not Ranked) - THE SIXERS WON! THE SIXERS WON! I REPEAT THE SIXERS FINALLY WON A GAME, AND THEN THEY WON ANOTHER GAME AFTER THAT WHICH I AM ATTRIBUTING TO MCDANIELS' PLAY AND TO NERLENS NOEL'S HIGH TOP FADE. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
10. Sara del Rey (Last Week: 10) - SARA DEL REY FACT: She unsuccessfully petitioned to get onto Team Chikara at the finale just so she could have smacked Jakob Hammermeier upside his head one more time, for old time's sake.