Thursday, January 15, 2015

Twitter Request Line, Vol. 105

If you can get to SHIMMER to see Cheerleader Melissa and her colleagues, do it
Photo Credit: Scott Finkelstein
It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman, and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag, and look for the bag to drop Thursday afternoon (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers!

If you're not in tune with the indie scene, you might be better off throwing darts to choose in most cases, depending on when you're available. EVOLVE, ROH, and the WrestleCon show will all pretty much offer a similar product with slight cosmetic differences, especially if you're going in blind. However, the shows are laid out so that you can go to several of them without too much overlap. Money could then be an issue since each ticket is north of $20 a pop. If I were to recommend going to one show and one show only, I would go for SHIMMER, which will be Saturday, March 28 at 12 noon at the Santa Clara County Fairgrounds, which is where all the WWN Live events are taking place. SHIMMER just recently started taking its show on the road during WrestleMania weekend, and it's the only time one might be able to catch them outside of the two weekends the promotion runs in Berwyn, IL. The talent roster usually includes the best women wrestlers in the world, including Cheerleader Melissa, the Canadian Ninjas, Kana, and Sweet Saraya Knight. Alumnae you might know in the mainstream promotions are Emma, Paige, Awesome Kong, Havok, Ivelisse, Natalya, Beth Phoenix, Bayley, Becky Lynch, and Madison Rayne among others. SHIMMER probably has the highest probability of delivering.

If you had money for two shows, I would do SHIMMER and then probably the WrestleCon live show, which is headlined by the Hardy Boyz wrestling Sabu and Rob van Dam. It also features former WWE guys like Big Ryck (Ezekiel Jackson), John Morrison, Matt Sydal (Evan Bourne), and Brian Myers (Curt Hawkins) as well as some of the most notable of notable indie guys. If you want to go to three shows, then I'd throw darts at the dartboard for the third one. Ring of Honor only has one show on Friday night. The WWN Live family is spamming the weekend, so maybe if you wanna check out one of those shows, you'd have a good time. Outside of SHIMMER, no marquee show is on the docket that you really have to see, so take a chance. You never know what will draw you in.

My favorite worked shoot ever was the time WCW fired Brian Pillman in an attempt to drive a story and then never bothered rehiring him before he went to ECW and then the WWF. But I doubt that's the answer you're looking for. The best worked shoot ever probably was the second Summer of Punk, when he dropped the hashtag pipebomb and threatened to hold the WWE Championship hostage. Granted, the ending didn't go so great as it segued into the most irrelevant 400+ day title reign ever and where the most direct payoff was a match between Triple H and Kevin Nash, but most worked shoots don't even get to end that well. I'd say it was the closest WWE ever came to becoming Attitude Era-relevant again in the mainstream, which says something about their attempts to recapture the magic.

My own personal answer is WWF In Your House: Canadian Stampede. It was a two-hour show where precious few minutes were wasted. The "worst" match on the card, a title match between Undertaker and Vader, might have passed for the best match on several other WWF pay-per-views at the time. The opener was one of the craziest brawls between two guys who ended up having a ton of crazy brawls in their career in Triple H and Mankind/Mick Foley. The Great Sasuke/TAKA Michinoku match may not have led to a great junior heavyweight explosion in the company, but it was damn fine for what it was. The main event was a masterclass in multiman tag matches, and the crowd was electric from opening bell to closing seconds. I know it was only two hours, where most shows are at least three. But why should I handicap this show against other shows that "need" filler? Maybe the lesson is that not every show has to have runtimes longer than the average Bible adaptation.

What happens to him when he comes back from his "firing" is going to be the biggest indicator. WWE should have done something with him a long time ago, but the booking team, more specifically Vince McMahon, has this skittish streak of whom to push and how long it takes for them to get to the top. This time period is nowhere near the 1980s anymore, where guys took a long time to incubate before getting pushed up to the top. Either you're a hand in the middle tiers forever, or you catch fire like a Daniel Bryan or CM Punk and get that rocket up your butt sooner rather than later. Ziggler's not the kind of guy that should be killing himself for the fucking Intercontinental Championship. He's gotta be headlining shows, having stories tailored for him, and working with the entire breadth of the roster, not just the guys in his purgatory. But does WWE see him like that? I'm not optimistic, but I'm gonna wait until he comes back to be vindicated or proven wrong.

Wait, he has momentum? You could have fooled me. That momentum went to pot the moment he jobbed to a hologram at Survivor Series. This feud with Bray Wyatt has been him spinning wheels, but luckily, he's Dean Ambrose and not, say, Zack Ryder, so he's still in a decent spot. In fact, he could win the Royal Rumble, in which case I would set him up for a triple threat at Mania against Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns for the title (that Rollins obviously would win at the Rumble). Of course, if he didn't win the Rumble, that match could and should still be on the table for Mania.

So I'm going to go with the second option. Ambrose doesn't win the Rumble, but he's somehow re-entangled with his Shield mates in a three-way match at Mania with number one contendership on the line. Reigns wins. After the match, he and Ambrose corner Rollins, but thanks to J and J Security, Rollins escapes. To close the show, Daniel Bryan defeats Brock Lesnar to win the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. The next night on RAW, Reigns comes out to congratulate Bryan, only to beat the ever-loving shit out of him. Rollins cashes in and becomes Champion, revealing all along that he and Reigns were in cahoots. As long as Rollins is Champion, Reigns will not sign any contract for a title match, thus protecting Rollins from his most dangerous contender. In exchange, Reigns gets a hefty bonus from The Authority in exchange for remaining as Rollins' muscle and not challenger.

Rollins and Reigns pick up wins respectively over Bryan and Ambrose at Extreme Rules, and then the Authority decrees that neither wrestler can get another shot at the title until they can "prove worthy." While Rollins moves onto other challengers for the late spring and summer, Ambrose and Bryan enter into a prolonged feud against Reigns and J and J Security with a bunch of trios matches alongside unlikely partners like Kane, Randy Orton, and John Cena. At Money in the Bank, however, Ambrose grabs the briefcase and cashes in after Rollins' brutal encounter against Cena at Battleground. However, Rollins shrewdly gets himself disqualified and keeps the title while stripping Ambrose of the briefcase. The street fight rematch would happen at SummerSlam. Eight months are in the books, and I don't know where I'd take it afterwards, especially since things in WWE tend to be volatile. But that booking ought to reestablish Ambrose in a big way as an edgy underdog and not just some dumbass who jobs to the weirdest shit.

I wouldn't, because I'm not into seeing how the sausage gets made or watching dudes work out. However, if one would want to go, my advice would be not to act like you've been there or like you're part of the club. Observe, ask questions, be respectful, don't make a mockery of what they're doing. It would be like someone walking into your science lab and fucking up what you're trying to learn by getting hands on.

They're neither right nor wrong, to be honest. They're just reacting to a sore old man who has lost touch with what works in professional wrestling. Cornette probably doesn't deserve the attention because he seems like the kind of guy who craves it, good or bad. However, I wasn't the one whom Cornette was trashing on his podcast. The Bucks were. They took the route replying to him that was best suited to their personalities, and you know what, whether or not they're "professional" or not, they defended themselves.

First, it would be helpful to get a list of all the starting NFL quarterbacks, which would be as follows: Tony Romo, Nick Foles, Eli Manning, Robert Griffin III, Aaron Rodgers, Matthew Stafford, Jay Cutler, Teddy Bridgewater, Cam Newton, Drew Brees, Matt Ryan, Russell Wilson, Carson Palmer, Colin Kaepernick, Tom Brady, Ryan Tannehill, Geno Smith, Ben Roethlisberger, Andy Dalton, Joe Flacco, Johnny Manziel, Andrew Luck, Blake Bortles, Zach Mettenberger, Peyton Manning, Alex Smith, Philip Rivers, Derek Carr.

I left out Tampa Bay, St. Louis, Buffalo, and Houston because they all seem like they're going to be in the market for a starter this offseason. Think of those teams as having vacancies at the position like they might have at the coach position. Anyway, the final four would end up as Newton, Roethlisberger, Brady, and Wilson, with Newton coming out on top thanks to his size, athleticism, and his willingness to pull some heel tactics along the way.

The men on NXT is the best idea possible because NXT could use a little chaos, and because Divas battle royales happen on the main roster all the time and are not treated with a whole lot of touch or delicacy. However, the match shouldn't be used for number one contendership at NXT's biggest show. Some similarities to the main roster are good, but I don't think developmental should be a carbon copy. But a mini-Rumble for a title shot at a stopgap show or at a Takeover event that isn't designated as the biggest on the calendar would be fine.

I was legitimately taken off guard in 2012 when Sheamus won the Royal Rumble, to be honest. I had no idea he was on the table, let alone going to win. When it came down to him and Chris Jericho, I thought it was only a matter of time before Jericho dumped him and set up the showdown with CM Punk that was rumored. But Sheamus won, and honestly, even if it was underwhelming at the time, if he didn't, I'm not sure the events that culminated at WrestleMania XXX could have ever happened.

He seems to be fit for the booth, which might make him overqualified for the main roster AM I RIGHT GUYS, HUH? In all seriousness, while he has the chops and the sharp mental acumen, could his giant body which I imagine is always causing him pain be able to sit behind a cramped desk that's always in danger of being collapsed violently in front of him? I wouldn't count on a career in broadcasting for the Big Show unless it was down in NXT.


The bWo guys have a campaign on Twitter to get included in the Rumble because it's in Philly, and I'm certainly on board for that. Even if it's just one of the guys like Stevie Richards or Blue Meanie, it would mean a whole lot. I'd love to see a guy like Jake Roberts or Scott Hall in the match if just to show that they're healthy enough to get in the ring, do some stuff, and get tossed out. Adrian Neville would be a prime candidate as a surprise NXT callup. Basically, I'd be down for anyone in the match as a surprise except the guy that I fear is a lock to be in, the Boogeyman. Sorry, he just skeeves me the fuck out.