Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Hideo Itami Has a Driver's License, Finally

Photo via @WWEBalor
Getting one's driver's license can be a momentous occasion, no matter whether that person is 16 or 60 at the time of acquisition. However, the American driver's test can be unnecessarily difficult at times. For example, so much stress is put on parallel parking, which for people who live in the suburbs with their driveways and garages is a bit like teaching a completely urban fellow how to milk a cow like it's a life and death thing. It took me four tries to finally pass my driving test, and I felt like I had the weight of the world lifted off my shoulders when I did. Imagine how elated someone would feel after his 27th try.

If the above picture is any indication, Hideo Itami is fuckin' stoked to have passed his driver's test. Unless running buddy Finn Bálor is ribbing everyone, Itami took 27 tries to get it right on the road in the States. Of course, being a wrestler in WWE doesn't necessarily require you to have a license, since you usually ride with one or two other guys to each show anyway. But the freedom is nice, especially if everyone else wants to hit up Godfather's Pizza, and all you want is a goddamn Big Mac.

Itami is still on the shelf thanks to a bum shoulder that kept him on the sidelines for the last couple of months. In the narrative, it was set up by a sneak attack by a phantom assailant. If the folks at NXT tied it all together by having Itami run his attacker over, well, I would certainly forgive the flashbacks I would get to Rikishi "doing it for The Rock." Either way, congratulations to the man for getting his license, because again, no matter how old you are, it's still one heck of an accomplishment.