Thursday, July 2, 2015

Twitter Request Line, Vol. 127

I see ROH going across the pond soon
Photo Credit: Scott Finkelstein
It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman, and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag, and look for the bag to drop Thursday afternoon (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers!

Ring of Honor is actually expanding, it seems. Expanding companies tend to try things like "get on television in other countries," especially English-speaking ones where it already has promoted shows. I don't want to get your (or anyone's) hopes up by saying I think some network in the UK will pick up ROH soon, but with TNA approaching its death-knell, it might open up a door for ROH somewhere around the fall. Don't quote me on this, however, but I wouldn't be shocked at all.

Well, which wrestlers have worn orange? It's not a popular color for gear. Basically, it boils down to Kobashi, Taz, and the Spectral Envoy (at times). My personal feelings would lead me to agree with you on Kobashi, because the man is one of the greatest wrestlers ever, no qualifier. But naming a "best" wrestler is so tricky because of stylistic preferences and such. But yeah, I would agree. Kobashi's the orange best.

Well, bringing out the "special occasion" stars for it is a start. I think WWE screwed the pooch a bit by booking Brock Lesnar for fuckin' Battleground, but it's the same premise as having him for Extreme Rules '12 and '13. But having Lesnar there for a marquee match is a start. WWE needs more people there too. Triple H is rumored to be on a collision course with Seth Rollins if you believe the reports from backstage. Relying on those reports is a fool's gambit, because Vince McMahon changes his mind more than a hotel changes bedspreads in a day. Another thing to help boost SummerSlam's profile would be to have someone earn a title shot through winning an event. Mania has the Royal Rumble, so why not have SummerSlam get the King of the Ring against the Champ? It's clearly a step down from the Rumble, just like SS is a step down from Mania. But it's something that other events don't have to boost their profiles.

But when it comes down to it, WWE needs to treat SummerSlam with a similar deference as it does Mania to make it feel special. The early reports of having it at the Red Bull New York stadium would have been a great start. I hear it's going back to Los Angeles next year, but hopefully it'll be at the MLS stadium in the area rather than the Staples Center. I also hope the lead up to it is treated as something special, not just "another PPV that happens to be in August."

Would it be bad if I made a "Big Show ultra reinforced ladder" joke about Chris Christie being in it? Yes? Okay, I won't make a joke about that then. Anyway, I don't particularly want any Republican candidate to win, to be honest, because I'm afraid the one I pick might pick up some mainstream steam and beat the Democratic candidate. But the least of all the evils to me seems like it'd be George Pataki, which kinda speaks to how dogshit the Republican field is. As for who would win, I don't know if Christie has cardio to keep up. Scott Walker would be jumped by a bunch of angry Wisconsin teachers. Rand Paul would be distracted when Kane kidnaps his father. Donald Trump would be the guy who preens on the ladder way too long and gets knocked off. God, I just checked Wikipedia and a billion people are vying for the Republican nomination. Oh well, I'll book them all to destroy each other and have Bernie Sanders sneak in and grab the briefcase, because hey, nothing in wrestling is ever supposed to make sense, right?

Given how long R. Bruce Tharpe has been promising it on Twitter, I would have to think that time has been taken to develop the thing. I get the feeling the streaming capabilities will be somewhere closer to WWE than TNA, but the real satisfaction factor will be how much content it has. WWE has control of quite a few NWA territorial tape libraries. How much Tharpe has control of will make or break this service, I think.

Well, I can't golf to save my life. I also don't know which wrestlers would be able to hit the links enough to pick up for me. I feel like Bret Hart has spent a lot of time golfing since his retirement. He's the first. Second would be John Cena, because he's the corporate goon who learned Chinese just so he could be a brand ambassador, a new level of corporate suckupery. He totally plays golf. Finally, I'd pick Brock Lesnar as the trump card, because the other teams can't win if they've gotten the holy shit kicked out of them.

Also, this question has to be the most random and weird one I've ever received for the Tweet Bag, so congratulations on that honor.

I'm on record as wanting Dolph Ziggler to leave, but if he does, he probably won't wrestle regularly for anyone outside of a one-shot here or there for Absolute Intense Wrestling (hometown discount) or a mega-indie like Pro Wrestling Syndicate. With that in mind, I love seeing Cesaro pop up on RAW every once in awhile, and he's having a low-key great year despite not getting above Smackdown or Main Event most weeks. But the dude needs to spread his wings. Sending him back to ROH would be recursive, because what else does he have that he could do there? But say the Temple is open for a second season, and I don't know, Dario Cueto needs a secondary option to battle the other forces of evil who have haunted him the last few weeks, and, no spoilers, will continue to haunt him through the finale. Matanza is only one monster. But Cesaro, or Claudio Castagnoli, he might be able to take on the Disciples of Death, either by himself, or with some old friends...

BADA BOOM, I'M DA REALEST GUY IN THE ROOM. HOW YOU DOIN'.

Well, you're forgetting another huge swath of humanity, hockey players. Odds are, if you're a hockey player from North America, either you're Canadian or you have a Canadian relative. It's in the bylaws or something. Other than that, I'd say you're covered completely except for Neil Young, but he's the exception to the rule.

Sure! Just don't light that fire in my living room again. My wife hasn't forgiven me for the water damage to our furniture.

Well, the Lady Yanks have made it this far with suffocating defense and maybe some fortuitous bounces, and now they will go up against the team that beat them in the 2011 finals. This is pretty momentous because a rematch has only happened once in either men's or women's World Cup play, in 1990 when West German men exacted revenge on Argentina for the 1986 tourney. I see a similar scenario playing out here. The USWNT is out for reprisal. The Japanese will be tough, but they were taken to the limit by England and needed an own goal by the Lionesses to advance. I like the Americans to win by a score of 2-0. BOOK IT, DADDY.
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