Wednesday, August 5, 2015

You Do Not Throw Rocks at a Man Holding a Machine Gun

Piper talked a big game...
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Part of the allure of "Rowdy" Roddy Piper was that he was always writing checks with his mouth that his body couldn't cash. Well, maybe that statement isn't totally true; Piper's brain was part of his body. One could understand him picking a fight with Hulk Hogan or Adrian Adonis or Greg Valentine. Those men, even Hogan in his godlike spotlight and choirs of Roman choruses singing his name wherever he went, were mortal.

But Andre the Giant? Yeah, if you piss him off, odds are you were ending up in a proverbial bodybag, which is to say I don't think he legit killed anyone. However, would you go up to a man proportioned like Ol' Andre and fuck with him? If you were sane, you wouldn't. If you were Piper, however, well, that would have been a whole different story. As you can find out for yourself in the following video, Piper has a bit of trouble getting a straight answer out of Andre over Big John Studd's claim that he bodyslammed the giant Frenchman. It wasn't much of an interview, but it certainly did its job.

The line "You do not throw rocks at a man holding a machine gun" became one of Piper's most iconic lines, but the actual context of it makes it even more ingrained in his DNA as a performer. It's brilliant.