Walk With Elias: The Official TWB Review

Walk with Elias... and his new EP
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Everyone knows the story of when Ted Turner bought the rights to Jim Crockett Promotions in 1988 and called Vince McMahon to say he got into the "rasslin' business." McMahon famously replied to him that he was in the "entertainment business," which really wasn't a lie. While wrestling was the mothership, McMahon's media empire had ambitions long past the squared circle as part of his nationalization strategy. Hulk Hogan's Rock 'n Wrestling and The Wrestling Album are the two big ones from the '80s, but the list from that phone call until now is pretty exhaustive: the World Bodybuilding Federation, WWF New York, the XFL, WWE Films, Camp WWE, and the XFL again. McMahon doesn't just want his wrestlers to be wrestlers, mainly because of course the most successful wrestling promoter in history hates wrestling. The latest in that attempt to make his workers into crossover stars is the four song solo acoustic guitar (and piano) EP, Walk With Elias.

The first track, "The Ballad of Every Town I've Been To," is basically a riff of all of his entrances, where he rattles off a list of American cities and promises to punch people in the face there because of how annoying they are, and it really goes from there along the same themes. Lyrically, the EP is a series of heel promos set to music, which at this point is all you can really expect from a dude who wrestles first and sings/writes second. Musically, it's simple, but simple can be good. If rumors of him not knowing how to play guitar until he was given the Drifter gimmick, it's impressive. I'm not sure if he plays piano (on "Nothing I Can't Do") on the album, but at this point, it's a wrestling character's album, so does it matter?

Where this EP is going to endear itself to the listener is that it's actually witty and humorous in spots, where you wouldn't expect it to be. "Nothing I Can't Do," specifically, has a false finish that starts up again and has Elias teasing the listener about them thinking the song had ended at that point. But it doesn't lack in soul or twang either. The last song, "Walk With Me," probably has more heart than your average Toby Keith radio track. That's where the EP has its rub. It's not treading new ground, but the places it revisits have an immense amount of respect, especially for a project that McMahon probably threw together once he saw crowds reacted to the Drifter character.

Of course, you could end up viewing this in two different lenses, either as accouterment to the Elias character or as an attempted piece of art in its own right. If it's the former, it's an unmitigated success. If it's the latter, well, it's inoffensive at worst and a touching evocation of old school country music in the vein of Johnny Cash that is pretty good for an amateur. Either way, it's a net positive. I would endorse listening to it at least once. You can do so without any extra cost other than your Internet bill/subscription fee on Spotify.