Tuesday, April 23, 2019

The Continuing Farce of Enzo and Cass

The dipshits who won't stop dipping or shitting
Photo Credit: WWE.com
So the former Enzo Amore and Colin Cassady, who now hilariously go by nZo and CaZXL, made a big splash by showing up at the jointly-promoted Ring of Honor/New Japan Pro Wrestling supershow, G1 Supercard at Madison Square Garden. It not only made headlines for the fact that it diluted the talent pool in Ring of Honor, but because no one in ROH decided to let the folks co-promoting the show that the two would show up. It not only caused a chain reaction of talent speaking out against the move, most notably the always-outspoken Tama Tonga, but news escaped that it rankled top New Japan officials who didn't like being kept in the dark. Needless to say, it was a gaffe in chauvinism and miscommunication that left egg on a promotion that quite frankly without New Japan to keep it relevant might be less buzzworthy than Impact Wrestling right about now.

For once in the company's miserable recent history, ROH did not double down on its bad personnel decision and decided not to pursue any further engagement with the team that has dubbed itself the "Free Agentz." They even hinted that maybe they gave into New Japan pressure when the press release for the last round of War of the Worlds guests started with, paraphrased, "the relationship between ROH and NJPW has never been stronger." That tone sounds like one who knows they fucked up and needed to give props to the people backing them. Honestly, it's not that I trust New Japan completely with personnel decisions. Remember, they stood by Tomoaki Honma even though he was accused of spousal abuse, which was laughed off domestically by Dave Meltzer and Jim Ross. They kept Michael Elgin on the roster (agan with Meltzer's approval/propaganda at home) even as he was under fire for covering up for a student of his accused of rape and when he himself was accused of domestic violence. That being said, I guess they have their limits, and it's not like I blame them.

Of course, Amore and Cassady felt wronged, and without context, I would agree with them. You bring someone in and have a handshake deal, and it's on the more powerful entity to keep their end of the bargain up. If they actually signed contracts, it'd be even worse. In this case, however, when Amore should be in jail and Cassady should be doing something other than wrestling (probably doing some racism detail for his homeboy Donald Trump), then it's not hard to at least remain neutral. But they're not going to take this lying down, no they're not, judging by whatever this was:
First of all, anyone calling this a "promo" doesn't know what a promo is. The word itself is short for "promotional appearance." What is Cass promoting here? The Briscoes aren't going to leave their ROH contracts to go work these two goons. Second, the "drawing money" argument seems like it was something burned in his brain from Vince McMahon-approved brainwashing sessions at wherever the recruits trained prior to the Performance Center opening. Like, I don't know how solvent ROH is, but I mean, whenever New Japan comes around, a promotion built largely on its in-ring product, uh, it does bonkers business. I think I'm most mad that Cass here made me kinda sorta side not only with ROH management but with the fucking Briscoe Brothers here. Like, you gotta be a real piece of shit to make me side with any of them, even if it's wholly in relative terms.

Amore and Cass (I refuse to use their bobo AIM screen name-ass names) have the kind of inflated self-worth that I wish wrestlers who weren't total ciphers had. Their bravado is about the only good thing they bring to the table, but unfortunately, because they're one-note hacks who can't even work to the lax standards of main roster WWE, any positives they bring to the table get lambasted because anything they touch turns to shit. Imagine if the WWE roster thought of itself collectively as these two idiots do. They'd have had a union years ago and would have hung Hulk Hogan from the TitanTron by his pinkie toes. But these idiots will keep yammering and yelling and they're still gonna get booked, hopefully not by anyone reputable. But because the world is the way it is, watch them get another run at ROH so they can "draw money" against the Briscoes. I'm going back to bed.