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| Huzzah to the taker of his father's mask! Photo via @BoomerHatfield |
1. Boomer Hatfield (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Not many wrestlers get to beat their dad in a match, but the younger Hatfield beat his dad Sunday night AND took his dang mask. For those who don't know lucha libre at large or even Chikara, mask vs. mask (or mask vs. hair or hair vs. hair) matches (or luchas de apuestas), are HUGE deals, especially for Dasher Hatfield. He may not have been in that gimmick for his entire career, but he's had a mask on, whether it be the generic Create-A-Wrestler, Mos-Cow the Communist Bovine, or Ultimo Breakfast. While Amasis lost his mask about two-and-a-half years ago, he shortly thereafter left the promotion. The last wrestlers to lose something of note to them and stick around were Icarus and Chuck Taylor, who put their hair on the line against the Colony's masks and lost. As for masked wrestlers who lost their hoods, I'm pretty sure Icarus and Gran Akuma were the last ones of note to do that, although I'm not entirely sure. My knowledge of Chikara before 2009 is hazy. ANYWAY, it's still a huge deal, and Boomer should be celebrated. He's one of the rising stars of Chikara, and I can see him making a huge splash elsewhere on the indies.
2. Cheeseburgers and Hot Dogs (Last Week: Not Ranked) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED ENTRY - Look, the prominent rise of people with smokers has pushed the staple summer holiday cookout fare to the backburner. While this development is expected given how good most barbecue food is, but you cannot discount the heavy lifting burgers and dogs do and have done. Before the Big Green Egg and other smaller electric smokers have put more amateur pitmasters in the game, the staples did the trick, and even now, do you know how expensive it can be to smoke brisket for more than a handful of people? You still need the burgers and the dogs to back it up. This Memorial Day and all summer long, I will continue to salute the staples by eating mass quantities of them whenever I can.
3. Michael Nakazawa (Last Week: Not Ranked) - The first time I saw Nakazawa was at King of Trios '09 where he teamed with Kota Ibushi and Kudo. He covered himself in baby oil, and I fell in love. So when he signed with All Elite Wrestling, I was hoping that he would bring that shtick to the company, and well, I was not disappointed, at least for the Casino Battle Royale. Y'know, if Fandango ever got his release from WWE, him going to AEW and doing posedowns against Nakazawa wouldn't be the worst thing to happen.
4. Orange Cassidy (Last Week: 3) - So he didn't win the Casino Battle Royale, but he did wrestle Kris Statlander the next day and throw her across the ring with a no-hands armdrag. It's all about the small victories.
5. People Throwing Milkshakes at Nigel Farage (Last Week: 8) - Farage, the British politician who brought about Brexit and is so fervently supporting it that he left his original racist party, UKIP, to form his own party that is obsessed with the severance of the United Kingdom from the European Union, is so shook from people throwing milkshakes at him that he refuses to leave his bus. Some people who claim to be leftists think this is a bad thing and think that folks should only be worried about policy and legislation. Let me rebut that; have you SEEN most politicians who claim to be "opposition?" At least in America, the Democrats LOVE to work with Republicans for some reason. You need direct action like this to make the fascists scared and then you can use the threat of dairy assault against, say, Nancy Pelosi or Chuck Schumer the next time they do something that's way too right wing for their positions.
6. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (Last Week: Not Ranked) - AOC quote-tweeted a video of Cody Rhodes talking about his interracial marriage and gave him dap for it, which can only mean ALEXANDRIA OCASIO-CORTEZ IS ALL ELITE, BAYBAY.
7. Jordynne Grace (Last Week: Not Ranked) - She's part of the first team announced for King of Trios, and my god, it's a doozy.
8. Erick Stevens (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Stevens has spent the better part of a decade on the shelf, cultivating a different kind of lifestyle as a food vlogger and Twitter personality, becoming one of the most chill dudes in Wrestling Twitter. So when he announced his comeback, you know I was all on board. To confess something for the sake of posterity, I wasn't always a fan of his when he was active the first time. But time changes perspectives. The wrestlers you like one decade aren't necessarily the ones you like another. Plus, like I said before, he's a cool dude, so it's hard not to root for him. And he didn't come back in easy either. In his second match back, he took on Chris Dickinson, who is one of the hardest-hitting dudes on the American indies. You have to respect it. I can't wait to see him work all over the damn place.
9. Aston Villa FC (Last Week: Not Ranked) - After several excruciating seasons relegated to League One, Aston Villa is BACK in the Premier League, baby! Of course, when they got relegated, I took up rooting for Crystal Palace, who didn't get relegated, so when these two sides face off in the next season, well, shit's gonna get awkward.
10. Otis
