Friday, October 18, 2019

Twitter Request Line, Vol. 277

I ain't 'fraid of no ghost
It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 280 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman, and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag, and look for the bag to drop Thursday afternoon (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers:

This is hard for me because the first movie that I really noticed for its soundtrack was Batman Forever, which came out in 1995. Before that, the earliest soundtrack I own is from 1992 (Singles). So this might be a cop-out answer, but I mean, no other movie soundtrack from the '80s has "Ghostbusters" by Ray Parker, Jr., so my answer is Ghostbusters because it has the song "Ghostbusters" by Ray Parker, Jr.

I know that Vanguard is mostly known for sausages, but man, that Paddy Melt looks MIGHTY good. I'll take three of those, and I'll also at least try the Okada, given its wrestling name and such. However, you'd think that from watching the G1 Climax that any dish named after the Rainmaker would be a beef bowl of some sort, given that Rocky Romero was sure to mention before every one of his big matches that he has a beef bowl before said matches. Then again, Vanguard is a sausage joint, so it's a wonder they even have a patty melt on the menu so...

Will Ospreay has a lot of moves that are extra and have bad names, but I'd probably get rid of the Robinson Special. It almost never looks good at the point of impact because he's never in place to do it right. Personally, I'd ban all of his moveset and exile him to Siberia if I could, and it's getting to the point where I am seriously considering skipping all his matches on New Japan shows going forward. That being said, that Robinson Special kick never looks good and I'd rather just never see it again.

The honorable mention is the Sling Blade because everyone uses it and only Hiroshi Tanahashi's looks good. But Tanahashi's looks good, so I can't get rid of it forever.

It's probably a 3. He's bothered a little bit because he can't be with the teammates he had for a long time finally breaking through and going to the World Series. I mean, anyone can have regret. Then he probably remembers the cheap ass owners and general manager tried to give him a shitload of deferred money on his contract, felt insulted again, and called up Matt Klentak begging him to sign Anthony Rendon and Stephen Strasburg. Of course, Klentak probably won't sign either one of them, but hey, he probably made the call anyway.

Bill Simmons came up with the term "Ewing Theory," a theory that states a team will do better when it's missing its big star. That theory is bullshit, since most teams that do better without their superstars are complete teams and just hit a spate of better luck. Would the Nationals be where they are now with Harper? I would say it's more than possible. They may not have had to play the wild card game to get into the playoffs if they had Harper. Of course, they could have then run into the Cardinals instead of the fraud choker Dodgers and lost and then people would continue to make fun of that franchise. Sports are cruel, and luck plays into them more than anyone wants to admit. But no, the Nats wouldn't be worse off with one of the five best position players in baseball on their roster because their team as constructed is still really, really good.

Venusaur is the best Pokémon, but Rowlet is top tier because it's a Grass-type who is cute and weird and incredibly meme-friendly. BUT VENUSAUR IS THE BEST DO YOU HEAR ME? VENUSAUR!

Protected user @earthdog:
After having some Humboldt Fog cheese this morning I was thinking "I wonder why TH has not come to visit or our Marin and North cheese tour" yet. What are the stops are your World Wide food tour become coming Marin for cheese?" #tweetbag Humboldt Fog is damn good cheese.
The short answer is I can get cheeses like that at Trader Joe's and save money. The long answer is that I have small kids, and California wine country isn't really a destination to bring them. It would be easier to convince the Mrs. to go to California to eat artisanal cheeses and see the sights than it would be to, for example, go to Los Angeles to eat In n Out and go to Pro Wrestling Guerrilla. But for now, I'll just have to get those cheeses at Trader Joe's I suppose.

¥8,000,000,000, but even then, I would use part of that money to hire security detail to make sure that when I talked shit about the Chinese government again, I'd be protected from their version of the CIA trying to have me killed.

WWE tries too hard with any top star anymore. I would argue that maybe they pumped the brakes on Lynch even after she won both titles at WrestleMania, but when they tried turning her real-life relationship with "Uncool" Seth Rollins into an on-screen partnership, they crossed into "Roman Reigns winning Superstar of the Year despite being injured for three months of it" territory. Vince McMahon has not only lost his fastball, but he gets no movement on his breaking balls, and people are even walloping his floater. He's lucky that Mohammed bin Salman and the folks at NBC Universal and FOX don't care about his failing ratings and are still shoveling cash at him anyway, or else. Or else.

However hard they're trying with Lynch though, they're trying 70 times as hard with Rollins though. I don't think he's ever gonna happen. Reigns will (in the same sense that crowds finally came around to Cena), but Rollins never.

I think it's less defined muscle and more that they don't have any mass. A guy like Josh Barnett can have a steroid beer gut, but people believe he can hit someone hard because he weighs over a certain threshold. Now, Barnett is believable as a hard hitter because he proved it in MMA. Someone like Sabre hasn't, and people say he shouldn't have people selling for him because he's not the size needed to be a believable grappler. Of course, those people might be right in a shoot, but the beautiful thing about wrestling is that it's a work. It doesn't matter if Sabre doesn't have muscles or if Allin would fight in the welterweight class in MMA or if Marko Stunt looks like he'd get washed in a schoolyard fight against a burly fifth grader. Wrestling is a place where anything can happen. You don't need to have your protagonist look like Mr. Universe for your crowd to get behind him, and that's why it's beautiful.

Jimmy Havoc is a dork though, and it has nothing to do with his physique. Everyone should kick his ass.

It's not a one-to-one analogy, because he didn't win the titles that Funk did, but Dustin Rhodes winning the All Elite Wrestling Championship would give off similar vibes. Chris Jericho remains Champion, filling the Raven role. Slide Jon Moxley into the Sandman role and, say, Darby Allin or Joey Janela into the Stevie Richards role, and you can do the whole thing at a pay-per-view like Barely Legal shot for shot. I'm not sure if Rhodes is on the EVP "not allowed to win stuff" list, but I think his body of work during his career has cemented him as someone who could win a World Title without batting an eyelash.

Darby Allin vs. Chris Jericho in a steel cage for the title with all members of the Inner Circle handcuffed to a hot water pipe in the arena boiler room. Let Allin win the title by doing a kickflip on his skateboard off the cage onto Jericho. I need to see this match, even though I've seen the two of them in the ring together before. If you want a match that hasn't been presented before, then give me Jon Moxley vs. CIMA for 30 minutes.
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