Thursday, March 5, 2020

Dy-No-MITE: The Assassination of Jon Moxley by the Coward Chris Jericho

The Champ didn't have a good ending to his night
Photo Credit: AllEliteWrestling.com
From the suburbs of beautiful Denver, CO (the place, not the man), the fallout of Revolution swept through All Elite Wrestling. Jon Moxley won the World Championship, but nothing else really changed. Still, bad blood stemming from the show lingered in at least two other areas.

A Viking Funeral for Dean Ambrose - Dynamite this week opened and closed with the adventures of Mox and the man he beat for the title, Chris Jericho. The show's bookends showed three major things: that Mox is that dude, that Jericho is a good enough heel to get people who are literally singing along with his entrance music hate him in one turn, and that the issue between the two is far from over. There was a slight fakeout, that Jericho might leave for 60 days if he couldn't incapacitate the Champion, ostensibly to tour with Fozzy. That was certainly not the case.

Moxley opened the show with a solo first-as-Champion address that dovetailed into Jericho's interruption and gauntlet. The first half of Mox's spiel was, in a word, polarizing. If you're forgiving to AEW and like to watch wrestling for the passion and the fire, it was another speech that solidified him as the biggest American wrestling star outside of WWE's orbit. If you're deep inside the bubble or have an axe to grind with AEW anyway, you'll probably find the claims that "pro wrestling IS BACK" to be far-flung or whatever. I'm in the former camp. WWE can take a few shots here and there, and in my opinion, it doesn't take enough. Anyway, Mox time and time again shows that he's the kind of guy you want to get behind, which is what makes having the big bad guys of the land putting him through a table with a move he used in a different lifetime so effective at making the crowd scream for their blood at a later date, right?

I think Jericho calling him the "lunatic fringe" and the Shield Bomb and even Mox saying "pro wrestling is back" as an ostensible shot at WWE feels like a Viking funeral for Dean Ambrose. All things that were familiar have been thrown on the barge and the impact on the tables off the stage was the flaming arrow shot from shore. Honestly, Mox in AEW has felt more like The Best Possible Dean Ambrose than anything else; his pre-WWE career was a healthy dose of Jake "The Snake" Roberts (more on that later, haha), John Zandig, and the latch-key kid from the other side of the tracks who would cut you if you didn't give him what was in your wallet. For reference, Mox in New Japan is "What if we trained someone from Bum Fights how to do MMA?" So, what will the post-Jericho Mox look like? If I had to gander, it would still be the Best Possible Dean Ambrose, because wrestling companies don't think about things like the people writing about them do. But I gather it'll be the BPDA without obvious attachments to the past.

Of course, one cannot talk about the final portion of Dynamite without speaking of one of two wrestlers who will join and maybe surpass Mox as The Guy in the company, Darby Allin. Obviously, Allin has his beefs with the Inner Circle, but oddly enough, it feels like his destiny is tethered to Moxley in that the latter will almost certainly be called upon to give legitimacy to the former. Obviously, the main event where Mox was supposed to team with Skater Boi Skull Kid was turned into a handicap match through extenuating circumstances. Jake Hager and Proud 'n Powerful, lazily disguised in lucha masks, destroyed Moxley to the point of medical attention. The rift can start at the point of pride that Allin competed and nearly won a match against the best in the company and his top lieutenant, falling only because of a lucky and well-placed Judas Effect counter to his formerly successful tope suicida. He held his own on his own, no need from a do-nothing Champion who only emerged to fight after the fight was decided. So much of wrestling rests in potential, and if AEW wants to pride itself on long-term storytelling, Allin's rise to a coronation should start here. Until then, my guess is a spot on Mox's War Games Blood and Guts team is a start.

It's also a disservice not to talk about Allin, the wrestler, because there's a reason why so many fans want him with the title on his shoulder. The energy he has in the ring, from the big set-piece stuff like the Coffin Drop to the outside on the entire Inner Circle to the showy things like the self-hot tag to the little things like his form on his topes, all of this stuff makes him such a complete package at such a young age. He commands the ring and the attention of the crowd so well that even if he wasn't in there with guys the caliber of Jericho and Sammy Guevara, he'd stand out. All in all, the main event portion of the show was all flames.

Boom Boom - At Revolution, it was revealed that neither Christopher Daniels nor Colt Cabana were The Exalted One. All signs continue to point to new free agent Matt Hardy, but until the debut happens, all anyone knows is that this Exalted One leads no fewer than four wrestlers and according to Evil Uno, will be mad at them for losing a relevos atomicos to SCU and Cabana. Everything about this match was baseline, but honestly, after the red hot opening segment, it was probably for the best that this one didn't leap off the page. Honestly, aside from Scorpio Sky making the hardest stuff look relatively easy, Cabana was the highlight here. His style of wrestling is so, in a word, arcane that when you say no one is like him, you can have reasonable confidence that your opinion is accurate.

Are Lattes Good for Your Teeth? - Dynamite was back to one in-ring segment for the women this week, and it was a squash match. Granted, it was a squash match for showcasing the ever-talented Big Swole, who is my pick to get the next pay-per-view title shot at Nyla Rose. I guess the most notable thing here is that Britt Baker was brought in for commentary. It sure wasn't the match because Swole kinda destroyed Leva Bates, as one should do when they get the benefit of enhancement. Baker, conversely, has won me over with her new character dealing in snide commentary. She even brought Tony Schiavone a Starbucks latte. I hope his name was spelled wrong on it. Anyway, choosing to have Schiavone as Baker's punching back and not Ross was a brilliant idea because Schiavone plays exasperated so well and has a good nature. Anyway, hopefully next week, AEW decides to build a second women's feud to the undercard of whoever challenges Rose next. I guess all the kvetching over the Nightmare Collective (and it was bad, don't get me wrong), at least it provided a secondary focus for a woman to feud over.

Caesar - Whenever a "legend" has appeared on weekly television, whether it be WWE or AEW, it has followed a similar formula, even with Diamond Dallas Page here. They show up, there's some faux deference, and everything feels like it's over-rehearsed and corny. It almost always feels like it doesn't matter. Jake "The Snake" Roberts has always had a reputation of bucking the trends. When he interrupted Cody to call him out over his bitching and whining over losing to MJF, it right away felt more real. Even though it felt like he was still trying to get his confidence behind him, Roberts was still every bit the guy who was MONEY with the stick in his heyday. There was no deference either way. Roberts, mocking Cody by calling him "Caesar" and talking about how his client was going to take Cody's piece of the pie, was confrontational in a way that didn't dissipate after he left the ring, turning his back to Cody after telling him that he never turned his back on anyone he respected or feared. He provided the bit of realness that always is missing from these ordeals, no matter how big of a bump a guy like DDP or Ricky Morton would take in the process.

Speaking of MJF, he called women he beds "rats" but his "I Pinned Cody" shirt was pretty cool, so it's hard to say whether he's bad or not. (He's still bad.)

Listen Up, Scumbags - Putting Pentagón, Jr. in a stable called the Death Triangle has extreme Ben Folds Five energy, but honestly, I don't hate the grouping at all. PAC needs to have minions, and who better to team with him than two guys who should always have something to do. Every week the Lucha Bros. are not on Dynamite is a policy failure. Anyway, the match that led up to it was another solid if unspectacular affair that was mostly notable for Jim Ross coding to Chuck Taylor that he should probably use steroids. No, seriously, he said Taylor had a big frame that could be bigger, and when someone who used to be in HR says that, you don't have to put much effort into connecting the dots.

Anyway, PAC solidifying another stable to go with The Inner Circle and the Best Friends sort of speaks to AEW splintering into Dragon Gate-like factions upon factions, where barely anyone doesn't have friends. Any workplace has cliques, wrestling or otherwise, with not a whole lot of ronin who keep to themselves. I speak of someone who is the ronin at my workplace. ANYWAY, WWE has drilled into people's heads that friends are for the weak, and that the best wrestlers walk alone. That works for Moxley, but does it work for everyone else? I don't think so.

Hangman Page Says Fuck You, I Do It Myself - After defeating Dustin Rhodes at Revolution, Hager got the second of two squash matches on this week's Dynamite against QT Marshall, whose backup of both Dustin and Brandi Rhodes intimated that there'd be some fuckery after the match. The Inner Circle's pile-on at the end of the match first drew out Matt Jackson, but it was Hangman Page whose running in was most notable. He saved his Elite friends, but serving up a middle finger to Jackson after showed some hard feelings remained between him and at least the Bucks. Honestly, that one action added more to Page's mythos than anything since saying "Cowboy shit." You can feud with someone without necessarily turning on them in the greater scheme of things.