Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Best Coast Bias: Well, He Did

Friendly reminder: don't poke the bear
Photo Credit: WWE.com
We've seen this movie before.

After the consecutive losses to Rusev last week and dropping one to Bo Dallas on Monday night, Mark Henry was on the defensive. And after Main Event's namesake he may be another couple of losses away from telling matriarch fornicators -- namely amongst them the Big Show -- to clear a path towards the Hall of Pain, he's going home.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 155

Diamond Dallas Page is on this week's clean version of the Austin show
Photo Credit: WWE.com
If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show
Episode: 155
Run Time: 1:40:28
Guest: Diamond Dallas Page

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Could Global Force Wrestling Be a Governing Body Instead of a Promotion?

A promotion or an umbrella?
Graphics Credit: Global Force Wrestling website
Word leaked that Global Force Wrestling's pay-per-view debut was scheduled to take place January 4, 2015. If that date sounds familiar to wrestling buffs, it's because New Japan Pro Wrestling usually holds its annual Tokyo Dome show, WrestleKingdom. While the upcoming WK is only ninth of its name, the traditional show has been held on that date at the Tokyo Dome since 1992. All of this talk sounds coincidental until you realize NJPW and GFW are partner promotions. Would GFW dare to hold its first show on the same date as its highest-profile partner? Or is this deal a way to bring NJPW to America as a Global Force branded show? Nothing is set in stone yet, but the dates lining up is enough to fuel rampant speculation.

One of the most salient observations, however, came from the Voices of Wrestling Twitter account yesterday after the announcement dropped:

Icarus/Jacobs Is Set Thanks to the Grand Championship Points System

Icarus may be facing the toughest test in his career in Virginia
Photo Credit: Scott Finkelstein
So the main event for Chikara's first ever visit to the Commonwealth of Virginia, Moonraker, has been announced, and it's not all that surprising. The last match of the October 26 show, and the weekend in general, will put Icarus in a match for the Grand Championship against Jimmy Jacobs of The Flood. This match seems to have been brewing for awhile, since Jacobs' focus has either been getting the Grand Championship for himself or for formerly brainwashed acolyte Eddie Kingston since his first promo as The Flood's figurehead. But the tweet that announced the title match mentioned that Jacobs had accrued three points towards a shot.

Saved You a Kliq

Saved You a Kliq is too sweet
@savedyouakliq on Twitter

Wrestling news is a tricky get. Either you have to pay money for insider sites or newsletters, or you take your chances going to aggregator sites that plagiarize those dirt sheets or plagiarize each other. The free content oftentimes gets changed from the original reporter's wording, and then the news item is copied ad nauseam on sites around the web, whether it be Rajah, Lords of Pain, or whatever other "NEWZ" site happens to exist. Then it's placed under a click-bait headline designed to get you to give the site a hit, even if the news is something as banal as Brodus Clay's opinion on John Cena's opinion of Randy Orton or a nebulous rumor that amounts to the phrase "plans are up in the air."

Don't Be a Lemon, Be a Civil Rights Leader

Photo Credit: WWE.com

Jesse Jackson showing up to RAW is surreal enough. I'm always amazed at the width and breadth of celebrity fans WWE attracts, but regardless of your opinion on Jackson (spoiler alert, he's super-polarizing), one might find it shocking that he would enjoy pro wrestling. Maybe anyone can like wrestling, but it's the years of savage societal messaging that it's a sport for hillbillies, babies, and the lower castes that have beaten me down to expect guys like Larry the Cable Guy or Antoine Dodson. IN reality, even WWE can border on the full artistic potential of the art, even if it's not all that often.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Cheap Heat Sept. 25

Cheap Heat discusses Night of Champions in the latest episode
Photo Credit: WWE.com
If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Cheap Heat
Episode: Sept. 25, 2014
Run Time: 1:04:12
Guest: None

Monday, September 29, 2014

Instant Feedback: Vince McMahon's Brick Tamland

Y'all got gak'd, son
Photo Credit: WWE.com
WWE and comedy seem to have an antonymous relationship. What passes for funny in the script usually tickles the ribs of one man, a dinosaur whose unrefined sense of humor was odd at best even in days of his youth. Vince McMahon's input into scripts and presumably his writers catering to him brought the RAW audience some "gems" in the last few years, with heavy emphasis on fecal matter and crude sex jokes. While comedy is a crucial lubricant for any successful wrestling show, WWE's attempts at hilarity have often been like greasing a machine with molasses instead of oil.

And yet, every time WWE went to the comic relief well on this episode of RAW, the bucket came up full, even when the script called for the usual poop (or in this case, green slime) and dick jokes, the laughs were there. Crediting Seth Rollins and more importantly Dean Ambrose for elevating the material is easy, and Ambrose especially deserves credit for keeping the crowd engaged and the joke progression on the rails. However, were the jokes here on point because for once, the framing was on point?

The Wrestling Blog's OFFICIAL Best in the World Rankings, September 29

Sexy all over
Photo via Bryce Remsburg's Instagram
Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list:

1. Bryce Remsburg (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Look at the above picture. No one parties that hard with Rockstar Spud without getting some dap.

2. AJ Lee (Last Week: 3) - The silver lining in the massive amount of CM Punk chants is that each one brings her closer to her limit break. When she goes into Trance, she will unleash METEORAIN and pretty much turn Chicago into a crater. THAT'S FOR TRYING TO PASS OFF TOMATO CASSEROLE AS PIZZA, JERKS.

3. @GEAUX_SAL (Last Week: Not Ranked) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED ENTRY - The little-known LSU booster came out of NOWHERE and ate 25 tacos for this year's #DoLoThroDo. His total bested the record (set by @PhilKenSaban last year) by four, which makes him the Barry Bonds of the Throwdown. Or would that make him Roger Maris? Mark McGwire? I don't know. Either way, 25 tacos is impressive, even if I'm pretty sure Sal will retain so much water that he could make it across the Sahara with no pit stops.

Beyond Wrestling Has Had a Star-Crossed Couple of Days

Guns are bad, and they got the latest Beyond event at FĂȘte Music cancelled
Photo via NBC 10 Providence
Beyond Wrestling has been in a rough way the last couple of days, to say the least. The promotion has had a strong 2014 so far, cementing FĂȘte Music as an independent stronghold in Providence, RI, and providing a stage for wrestlers like Kimber Lee, Silver Ant, Biff Busick, and Drew Gulak to solidify their resumes. However, an unforeseen closure to said venue at the last possible minute throttled Makin' Moves, what would have been seventh show Beyond staged there this year alone. Furthermore, the venue for the ambitious, limited-entry craft-beer themed show Beerly Legal cancelled on the promotion with two weeks notice. If you're among the the throng of Beyond's fans who looked forward to either show, then the only person who's had it rougher than you the last couple of days has been Denver Colorado, the man, not the place.

Fan Fiction Book Report: Celebrating Christmas With the Wyatts

They like Christmas, who knew!
Photo Credit: WWE.com
We’re back with another edition of the Fan Fiction Book Report. It has been a few weeks since we did the first one. I’ve been busy, but I hope to do more. For this edition, we head back to the Fan Fiction dot net headquarters and bring you a short story (a flash fiction to be exact) about the Wyatt Family. The story is called “A Very Wyatt Christmas.”

The story starts off on Christmas Day at the dinner table, presumably outside in some Louisiana forest somewhere. The film crew for Southern Comfort probably wasn’t far away.

Smackdown: Friendship is Magic

Show gets "Best Friend" honors this week
Photo Credit: WWE.com
This was the last Smackdown that I'll see before I get married, so I was hoping for a good episode as a wedding present of sorts, and I wasn't disappointed. Fun matches all around!

Needs No Friends—Dean Ambrose
I've said this about Dean Ambrose before and I'll say it again. Despite the fact that he is still upset about Vile Traitor Seth Rollins breaking up the supportive and successful friendship of the Shield, Ambrose is doing pretty well as a solo act. On Smackdown he first triumphed over the still-entertaining duo of the Miz and Damien Sandow. Then, when confronted with the emerging partnership of Rollins and Kane, Ambrose got away and swiped the Money in the Bank briefcase to boot. In the face of two solid partnerships, Ambrose stood alone and once again made me question my “Friendship or bust!” policy.

Best Coast Bias: A Pack Of Rematches

Pretty sure that's international for "Y'all done effed up now"
Photo Credit: WWE.com
The latest edition of NXT was bookended by a pair of return matches. Come next time around, Tyson Kidd gets the Resoian one more match against Adrian Neville and Charlotte, begrudging respect and all, will acquiesce to going in against Bailey again.

At least in the case of the main event rematch for the Tag Team Championships, it felt like something to burn through in order to get to the real story at hand: Hideo Itami is pissed off, and the Ascension are going to find themselves for the first time in some time in their NXT careers, if ever (and appropriately enough seemingly on their way out to the door to elevation) on the wrong end of a yahkicking. For a lot of you reading the BCB, you know Hideo's going to need a royal level of backup in order to do what he does best, and in a few weeks it's going to air when he gets it and Full Sail loses their shite.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 154

Austin talks movies this week
Photo Credit: WWE.com
If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show Unleashed
Episode: 154
Run Time: 1:29:35
Guest: None

Friday, September 26, 2014

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Art Of Wrestling Ep. 217

Page recounts the Spring Stampede 1997 story and more with Colt Cabana
Photo Credit: WWE.com
If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Art Of Wrestling
Episode: 217
Run Time: 1:17:39
Guest: Diamond Dallas Page