Highlights
- Daniel Bryan lost the World Heavyweight Championship in 18 seconds, eating a Brogue Kick from Sheamus after receiving a good luck kiss from AJ.
- Kane defeated Randy Orton after a super chokeslam.
- The Big Show became the most decorated wrestler in WWE history by winning the Intercontinental Championship.
- There were no highlights in the Divas match. None.
- Undertaker revealed his hair for the first time, sporting a crew cut with a Mohawk-style strip going up the back.
- Taker at one point put Shawn Michaels in the Hell's Gate, causing Michaels to give Taker the Sweet Chin Music when he came to.
- Triple H needed to be helped from the ring after Taker defeated him to go to 20-0 at WrestleMania.
- John Laurinaitis is the new general manager of both RAW and Smackdown after Miz pinned Zack Ryder. Miz took advantage of Ryder being distracted by Eve Torres being escorted from the ring.
- Eve kicked Ryder in the crotch after the match.
- Laurinaitis informed CM Punk backstage that a disqualification would cost him the Championship
- Punk retained the WWE Championship with the Anaconda Vice on Chris Jericho.
- The Rock defeated John Cena with a Rock Bottom after Cena tried to mockingly go for the People's Elbow.
General Thoughts
- Lilian Garcia has a set of pipes on her. Good to see her get the shot at "America the Beautiful".
- I was thoroughly pissed off that the World Championship match only got 18 seconds, especially since we got a throwaway segment with Heath Slater and Flo-Rida, a patently racist Brodus Clay mama dance segment and eight commercials (I count the Santino/Foley segment for The Deadliest Catch a commercial.
- Miz getting no respect in the backstage segment was a nice touch of foreshadowing.
- If you don't think David Otunga is awesome after he came into the scene flexing while drinking from his travel coffee mug, you will never think he's awesome.
- Audible "Daniel Bryan" chants in the beginning of Kane/Orton. Vince McMahon has no idea the makeup of his WrestleMania audience, does he?
- Kane looked surprisingly spry. I thought he was the clear strong link in his match with Orton, which was surprisingly slick.
- Is it just me, or does Orton add a move or two to his moveset every three months or so? Swinging neckbreaker tonight.
- Does anyone know what the fuck "Pack 'em wags" meant? Some of those signs were seriously head-scratchers.
- That being said, the "Mike Tyson bit my sign" sign that surfaced first during the Intercontinental Championship match was awesome.
- Cody Rhodes had one of the two best matches at last year's WM, and his match with Show wasn't as good. However, he himself had a better performance than he did a year before, if that makes sense. He's getting better at handling psychology.
- That being said, the spear Show landed out of the counter to the second Disaster kick was SICK.
- "Daniel Bryan" and "YES! YES! YES" chants during the Divas match.
- It says something when the worst wrestler in a match with the cohost of a Hollywood gossip show is Kelly Kelly, although Eve was the one who fucked up the most noticeably when she lazily shrugged off Kelly's handspring elbow in the corner.
- The first hour of the show had half the matches announced therein. So, the World Heavyweight Championship match was 18 seconds why?
- With the fanfare that both Trips and Taker got last year, I was shocked that neither one got an ostentatious entrance this year.
- "20-Ooooohhhhhh" sign, nice Paul Bearer reference.
- "Why is Heidenreich fighting Triple H?" -- Tom Kingsmill
- I actually would've compared Taker to Sgt. Hatred from Venture Bros.
- I have to hand it to both guys; they took some major league bumps in this match, especially Trips on the apron taking the leg drop and Taker taking the spinebuster on the steps.
- I also loved Triple H's counter of the first Hell's Gate from the steps into the power bomb.
- The ref-stoppage teasing might have been easily the most "love it or hate it" part of that match. Oddly, I loved it.
- LIL NAITCH SIGHTING!
- When Undertaker stepped on the head of the sledgehammer, the only thing I thought to myself was the phrase "like a bawss".
- While it was a good match, Taker/Trips totally did not need the cell, except for protecting the crowd when they were tossing shit out of the ring willy-nilly.
- Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins making an appearance on Mania? I'll take it.
- Say what you want about Zack Ryder, but the guy always has snazzy ring gear. His gear tonight was the epitome of his fandom becoming personified. So happy for him.
- Booker T definitely still has it. He worked the face in peril shtick beautifully.
- Aksana's spear on Vickie Guerrero made Edge's look forceful.
- Hey guys, I thought The Miz was being buried, huh?
- Also, The Miz is undefeated at WrestleMania, as pre-show dark matches don't count.
- Jericho's jacket had some malfunctioning lights. Notice they didn't show his left side a whole lot during his entrance.
- Notice who got the best pyro of the night? Yep, CM Punk. That was rock star pyro.
- Any doubts I had about Jericho getting big match stage fright were allayed in the beginning when he played off the "Punk loses the title if he gets DQed" angle perfectly.
- Punk and Jericho both took some huge bumps in this match too. Tonight was a great night for bump freaks and fans of them.
- Even better in this match was the counter wrestling. Some of the exchanges were so well done and gave the match a very bigtime feeling.
- The best counter of the match was Jericho turning the top rope Frankensteiner into the Walls of Jericho.
- I've been a defender of the Funkasaurus, but that shit with his mom? Yeah, that was the most racist thing I've seen on WWE TV since... well, let's not get into this.
- If body mass of the competitors' music performers were any indicator, it shouldn't have come as any surprise that Rocky was going to win. Machine Gun Kelly makes Kelly Kelly look like Beth Phoenix.
- You could cut the sexual tension between Rocky and Cena before the match with a knife. I almost expected them to start making out.
- If the story of the main event was to portray Rocky as the out of touch movie star and Cena as the well-oiled pro wrestler, they did a great job. It was the little things, like Rocky failing at his first People's Elbow attempt and Cena right after hitting the Five Knuckle Shuffle. The finish played into that too with Cena's hubris being the only thing that caused his downfall.
- Best part of the main event though? The old-school hand raising spot with Rocky in the STF.
Match of the Night: There were two instant classics tonight. It was hard for me to pick, but surprisingly between the Hell in a Cell and the WWE Championship match, I think the better one was Triple H vs. Undertaker. For as poorly laid out as their match was last year, the tilt this year was pitch perfect. They didn't venture into the layabout spots until after they were earned through carnage. Taker can still throw his soup bones with the best of them. The bumping was top notch. The big spots were placed perfectly. The melodrama with Michaels wanting the match to stop actually worked for me. It was almost like they watched the tape last year, and while they probably thought last year's match was good, they didn't want to recreate it. Thankfully, at least for me, they totally knocked this one out of the park. Maybe it was my lowered expectations, but I was blown away. The only thing that was missing was a fortuitous rain shower.
Overall Impressions: Let's get it out of the way first. WrestleMania this year had some pretty low lows. There was no excuse for the World Championship match to go 18 seconds. Yes, I know there was symmetry from when Bryan won the title. There's storyline advancement with AJ "costing" him the title. HE's a heel who's supposed to get comeuppance. But still, the fact that we were deprived a Sheamus/Bryan match for the second year sticks in my craw. Those two can create magic in the ring. Why not let them and find some other way to get over whatever stories they wanted to get over? Did we really need all the commercials? Did we need the race baiting before the main event? Did we need the Flo-Rida/Heath Slater segment? I mean, I'm not even going to begrudge them the pre-main event performances. I dunno.
But other than those things, wow, did they put on a show. Again, there were two instant classic matches. Rock and Cena came kinda close, although I thought there were similar pacing issues that Taker and Trips had last year (although not nearly as egregious). Kane and Orton shocked the world by having probably the fourth best match on the card. It actually felt like a big event this year. I might go so far as to say that this was the best Mania in The Wrestling Blog era, but I did love me XXVI a lot too. It's tough.
It can be easy to understate how important having really memorable matches is. However, with Taker/Trips and Punk/Jericho, there were two Mania matches that will more than likely stand the test of time. Who knows, maybe Rock/Cena will too. It might not be a standalone, as they clearly were booking it with a rematch in mind, but that finish was very well-done.
Results
- Sheamus d. Daniel Bryan for the World Heavyweight Championship
- Kane d. Randy Orton
- Big Show d. Cody Rhodes for the Intercontinental Championship
- Kelly Kelly and Maria Menounos d. Beth Phoenix and Eve Torres
- Undertaker d. Triple H in Hell in a Cell
- Team Johnny d. Team Teddy when The Miz pinned Zack Ryder
- CM Punk d. Chris Jericho, retaining the WWE Championship
- The Rock d. John Cena
