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| How will this tender moment culminate? In disastrous fashion, obvs. Photo Credit: WWE.com |
Nothing happens – Odds: A googol to 1
Again, reiterating here, there is no way in hell that shenanigans don't happen, so betting on this would be a fool's wager.
AJ and Bryan don't get married because they're "just really close friends" (i.e. Billy and Chuck) – Odds: 10,000,000 to 1
I wouldn't put it past the creative team to rehash this, even though it wouldn't make a lick of sense, but c'mon, I don't think they're that stupid.
Field – Odds: 300 to 1
There are a ton of ways this could go wrong without any of the other reasons listed here, but I feel like they're going in a direction that isn't too hard to pick up on.
Kane crashes to profess his love – Odds: 100 to 1
Personally, I think that the Smackdown proceedings Friday night featuring Kane and Daniel Bryan are a red herring meant to throw everyone off. That being said, it does bear mentioning at the very least. Kane was pretty entangled with the web of love (lust?) that AJ spun. He said that he thought she was too crazy for him, but then again, since WWE writers are not creative and oftentimes like to portray all of a certain demographic as the same, it wouldn't be too far-fetched to think that Kane digs crazy chicks as well, because he's obviously not gay and a man like CM Punk, the other guy who digs crazy chicks, is.
CM Punk crashes to profess his love – Odds: 75 to 1
Punk was most recently joined at the feud with Bryan, but it feels like he's about to move onto a feud with John Cena and/or The Big Show. That's only a feeling though, and WWE has been known to draw out feuds past their best-used-by date. It would be totally antithetical to the Punk character, but again, WWE hasn't had problems doing that either. Still, I think this is a longshot at best.
Reception marred – Odds: 60 to 1
WWE used this once before, but it was a long time ago and for a far more iconic wedding. While they rehash shit all the time, I don't think they're going to wait as long to have things go all pear-shaped here as they did with Macho and Liz.
CM Punk's sister shows up drunk, professes love for Bryan – Odds: 50 to 1
This wouldn't be to further the Punk/Bryan feud as much as it would be to spark a new feud for AJ here. Granted, I'd rather not see this happen as it would reinforce one of WWE's tired tropes that women only care about men because sex and all that, but it's an option on the table just because Punk's sister is an established alcoholic/character in the WWE Universe.
(Please though, don't poach whoever it is playing Claire Lynch from TNA, thx.)
Someone objects for reasons other than the profession of love – Odds: 35 to 1
It could be Punk, Kane, Christian or anyone to come out and say that AJ deserves better, but the person objecting would have to do so for reasons other than wanting to jump the bones of either the bride or groom to be. I think this has somewhat believable odds of happening, but I don't think it's scandalous enough for the writers to indulge.
AJ pregnant – Odds: 15 to 1
The logical procession from marriage is pregnancy, right? Well, what if the only reason for AJ saying YES! YES! YES! is because she's with Bryan's child? Or with someone else's child? A shotgun wedding would be a logical step in with the Jerry Springer nature of this angle already, so while I don't think it's as likely as the rest of the options, I'd definitely put money on this as a likely-yet-lucrative option.
Christian/Punk/whomever crashes for the express purpose of giving Bryan physical comeuppance – Odds: 10 to 1
WWE LOOOOOOOOOVES short payoffs that humiliate heels, and Bryan, unless the proposal itself was a face turn, is still one of WWE's most effective villains. While I get the gut feeling that he's going to be rechristened as a good guy sooner rather than later (the crowd reactions don't lie, even if I think it would be a terrible idea because those reactions are more ironic and based from the crowd that WWE hates booking to, supposedly), there's always the chance that it will end with someone causing physical harm to Bryan. Of course though, Bryan will make that ass-kicking look super legit, because that's how he rolls.
Bryan as runaway groom – Odds: 15 to 2
Of course, if Bryan was going to stay a bad guy, wouldn't the ultimate dick move be for him to continue his disingenuous streak and stand AJ up at the altar? Of course it would be. That's why I think one of the things that we should be expecting is something like this. By the way, for those who hate math or can't divide, that translates as 7.5 to 1 odds. Why didn't I say it? BECAUSE VEGAS DOESN'T PRINT ODDS LIKE THAT, THAT'S WHY MOTHERFUCKER. Oh, sorry, capslock key got stuck.
[Wrestler X] shows up, professes love for either – Odds: 5 to 1
WWE is cycling in/elevating new and fresh wrestlers, and what better spot would a debuting, oh, I don't know, say Dean Ambrose or a freshly resurgent Miz have to make people notice them? Miz isn't the obvious choice, but the look he gave AJ after she dropkicked him off the apron last week might have been a dead giveaway. Also, if it's Ambrose, then WWE is totally reading my blog. Either way, if it's anyone other than the usual suspects listed above, then it would not only be not surprising, it'd be a really good idea.
AJ as runaway bride – Odds: 2 to 1
Duh, because she's a crazy chick and that's the kind of thing that a crazy chick would do. DUH.
Someone goes through the cake – Odds: Off the table
I'm so sure that cake is getting defiled tonight that I'm not even giving odds for it. The money is too easy.
