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| Daniel Bryan is a good guy, the best good guy to me at least. Photo Credit: WWE.com |
First offering this week is from @OkoriWadsworth, who wants to know my fave five babyface wrestlers.
What is a babyface? Is it just a guy who gets cheered, or is it someone who actually acts noble enough to be deserving of the title of good? I'm gonna go for the latter, because that's more challenging.
1. DANIEL BRYAN - Yes, he's petty. He's paranoid. He's selfish and irascible. But are good guys flawless paradigms of virtue, or are they good because they have good intentions and are relatable? Bryan and Kane have pretty much been acting out a relationship to a tee without ever delving into the sexual portion. Who can't relate with what Bryan is going through? Then when you have a moment like at the end of Main Event, when Kane reached out for the tag, and Bryan accepted it? That's catharsis.
2. JOSEPH PARK - This character deserves all the plaudits in the world because he has made a wrestling lawyer sympathetic. Think about that. A. Wrestling. Lawyer. There is only one character that gets a shorter shrift than lawyers in wrestling promotions, it's a Communist Soviet Russian. And yet the pathos he plays his character with is just amazing. His original endgame was to find his brother, but really, his brother was a terrible character. Abyss is an awful, derivative character, a waste of his true talents. But Joseph Park? Holy shit, I want to root for this guy. I want to get behind him, and when he "learns to wrestle," I want to see him win every title belt in Impact Wrestling.
3. ACH - I think anyone who wars with the Submission Squad is a babyface by default. However, ACH is just one of those wrestlers who carries himself with confidence and swagger. I think some people would mistake it for thuggish cockiness, but I'd question their intentions at think it that way. If you can't root for ACH, you can't root for anyone.
4. BULLY RAY - He's gone from being the best heel in Impact to being the best babyface in such a short time that it might have caused whiplash in the less initiated viewer. WE always knew he could be a good bad guy, but how did anyone know he could be an awesome hero on his own? He's gotten cheered before, but it was always because he put women through tables. Now, he's actually someone I feel good about rooting for. It's surreal.
5. THE SPECTRAL ENVOY - Because I'm pretty sure if you like Chikara and aren't a fan of UltraMantis Black, you're doing it wrong.
Next up, auteur of the Atomic Elbow, Robert Newsome, wants to know if those security guards at Chikara really are part of a long-running angle.
If it is, it's a master stroke of an Easter egg. They've been around since I think 2010, which means 2013 will be their fourth year as an ominous presence around Chikara shows. Is it just a function of their higher profile, or is it, well, a harbinger of things to come? If it's the latter, then it'll be pants-crappingly awesome whatever it is. I lean towards the former though.
In the spirit of Survivor Series, @fte88 wants to know my dream, all-time Hoss Fight five on five elimination match.
Man, this almost makes me want to do an entire Hossvivor Series card. I have to restrain myself because I will spend myself on this question and have nothing left for other questions. So here we go, how about two matches, one all-time and one current?
CURRENT HOSSVIVOR SERIES MATCH
Big Show, Antonio Cesaro, Michael Elgin, Kevin Steen and Doc (Luke Gallows) vs. Ryback, Sheamus, Willie Mack, Matt Burns and Asylum
ALL-TIME HOSSVIVOR SERIES MATCH
Brock Lesnar, Mark Henry, Batista, Big Show and Big Van Vader vs. Andre the Giant, Dusty Rhodes, Undertaker, Kane and Bam Bam Bigelow
@sallen_87 wants me to pit the gopher from Caddyshack against the mouse from Mouse Hunt.
Sadly, I have never seen Mouse Hunt, so I cannot answer this question. However, I'd pay money to see a rematch between the gopher and Bill Murray.
@DaveMuscarella asks which match is better for the Chikara season finale: Mr. Touchdown vs. ACH or Mr. Touchdown for the Mysterious and Handsome Stranger.
Well, what you think about this match depends on what you think about the Touchdown/Stranger feud. If you think that it's ready to end or at least climax, then yes, you'd probably be wishing that they had booked Stranger against him instead of ACH. If you think there's way more time in 2013 to explore it, then you're fine with ACH getting the shot at the Young Lions Cup.
So, what do I think? "Killing" Sapphire is really the first time they really crossed paths. To blow it off at the finale to me would be WWE storytelling. To keep it going for another year? That's a lot of territory to explore. Besides, I'm going to be there live more likely than not. Why would you want to deprive me of seeing Touchdown/ACH II: THE YOUNG LIONSENING?
A podcast question! @MaskedTweeter wants to know whether I come up with my podcast titles before or after I record.
It depends. For Bryce Remsburg, I have it picked out before, because I have a theme for him. His designated band is The Beatles, so I usually have one selected for him. For everyone else? It's record first, name later.
By the way, how has everyone been enjoying the podcast naming system?
Norko Kipte of the A1 Podcast asks about my thoughts on bologna.
It's low on my lunchmeat ranking scale. It's not terrible, but I don't eat hot dogs raw for a reason. They're not that good unless you grill them. It's way better than regular old boiled ham. And don't give me the whole "imported" adjectival description either. It's imported ass. At least crust that shit in some pepper before you serve it to me. Or, y'know, slice up a real, honest-to-God Virginia baked ham like a human being would.
Finally, Vince Morales of ¡Olé! Wrestling wants to know whom I'd like to see defeat the Young Bucks for the Campeonatos de Parejas
Well, I certainly don't want it to be 1-2-3 Kid and Marty Jannetty. They're going to get the title shot, but I doubt they win. But who do I want to see finally beat the Bucks? 3.0 would be a great choice because their first reign was total weaksauce. Losing it on their first defense? I usually don't think Chikara has bad booking, but that was a close to bad booking that I could ever think from them. If not 3.0, then I'd go with Tsubasa Kurigaki and Commando Bolshoi. Why? Well, why not? Of course, it's totally not feasible because they'd take the belts back to Japan like Tadasuke did with the YLC, but if you could get them over here for a six month residence, then hell yeah, I'd do it, just because I want desperately to see Kurigaki pick people up and put them down (violently).
