The Wrestling Blog's OFFICIAL Best in the World Rankings for October 7, 2019

The leader of the King of Trios Champions
Photo Credit: @Boo_Nanners

Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list:

1. Ophidian (Last Week: Not Ranked) - What the flesh conceals the fire reveals. Ophidian led his squadron of Kimber Lee and Lance Steel to a win in King of Trios this past weekend, marking the first time he's been on a winning team. The team member he jettisoned, The Whisper, ended up winning Rey de Voladores. The Crucible seems as strong as ever, and after Ophidian's trio has won the whole damn thing, he's focused on the banked Golden Opportunity he earned from the Johnny Kidd Invitational. I don't think he's done conquering just yet.

2. Cain Velasquez (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Yes, he appeared for WWE after tantalizing everyone with dreams of a MMA dude doing lucha libre, but honestly, the bigger the bag he can secure from Vince McMahon for a few dates, the better it is, especially if he takes the WWE Championship to AAA after beating Brock Lesnar for it at Saudi Fuck Money IV: I Don't Know the Name "Jamal Khashoggi," Please Try Again.

3. Maki Itoh (Last Week: 1) - She's already dangerous, but add a can of Monster Energy? The world doesn't stand a chance.

4. Brandon Graham (Last Week: Not Ranked) - The Eagles pass rush exploded yesterday with 10 sacks of the hapless Jets, Graham leading the way with three. Of course, you could say "they're the Jets," but shouldn't you expect a team with a supposedly good pass rush to get double digits vs. a team that's as bad as the New York AFC squad?

5. Quesadillas (Last Week: Not Ranked) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED ENTRY - Mexicans do grilled cheese far better than we do, because a slightly crispy, slightly pliable tortilla is way better than bread as a conveyance for massive gobs of cheese.

6. Orlando Scandrick (Last Week: Not Ranked) - The Eagles signed him off the streets, and he just came in and ripped the ball out of Luke Falk's hands for the final score of the game. That's what I call endearing yourself to the fans with emphasis.

7. Solo Darling (Last Week: Not Ranked) - While they may have ducked out of the big tournament night one, Darling and tag partner Willow Nightingale won the Tag Gauntlet and got themselves another point. They may have three, in which case, Team FIST better watch out, especially since Darling has some unfinished business with one Travis Huckabee.

8. Orange Cassidy (Last Week: 4) - Pfft, who cares he wasn't on the first episode of Dynamite. He's too cool for that shit anyway.

9. Riho (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Riho is probably the best actual wrestler on the roster, so the sting of Nyla Rose not winning the first Women's Championship is dulled a bit. Also, I hear people complaining about someone the size of Rose selling for Riho, and it's like, have you ever been elbowed by a toddler? No matter how big you are, getting hit with the sharp edges of the body, especially in the face, isn't exactly a walk in the park, you know. That match was worked incredibly smartly.

10. Tony Schiavone (Last Week: Not Ranked) - You know what the best part of the booth was on Wednesday? It was... wait up blog fans, we're out of time for this week. Tune in next week for the Best in the World Rankings!