These spoilers are REAL and LEGIT please credit Tom Holzerman and The Wrestling Blog ® for reporting them to other sites, on Twitter or to your 10th grade English teacher. PLAGIARISM IS WRONG.
Again, these spoilers are 100 percent LEGITIMATE. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
- Show opens with Dolph Ziggler coming out. He claims he is going to cash in his Money in the Bank briefcase TONIGHT!
- Kane and Daniel Bryan shown on the TitanTron getting out of a limo and heading into Morimoto in Olde City.
- Segment backstage. Alberto del Rio complains that Randy Orton and CM Punk not wearing pants is hurting the morale backstage.
- Ryback appears in the ring. He chants "FEED ME MORE" until the entire Chikara roster comes out, including Swamp Monster, to eat his finisher. He finishes off by grabbing Mike Quackenbush by his throat and throwing him into an oncoming forearm from Kassius Ohno, who randomly materialized in the corner.
- Kane and Daniel Bryan argue over what to order for drinks at Morimoto. Bryan wants sparkling water. Kane wants goat's blood. Their wine sommelier is Dean Ambrose, and he brings them fortified wine in a can.
- Booker T announces that del Rio makes a good point, but he can't make both men put pants on. So CM Punk and Randy Orton will wrestle in the main event "Loser Has to Wear Pants for a Week" match.
- Zack Ryder comes out, but is immediately hit by an oncoming SEPTA train.
- Back to Morimoto, their waiter, who is also Dean Ambrose, brings each man out their appetizers. Kane orders the tuna sashimi, but gets the daikon and bean sprout salad. Bryan gets Kane's sashimi. HIJINX ENSUE.
- The train conductor, also Dean Ambrose, takes a drug test and tests positive for enough crack to have it come up in his system, but not enough crack to be fired from his job at SEPTA. Zack Ryder, who miraculously survived, says "Are you serious, bro?"
- Some ethnic folks have a tag match.
- Layla defeats Beth Phoenix with a roll-up.
- Back at Morimoto, Iron Chef Masaharu Morimoto comes out and does the same thing he does in every Iron Chef battle - make a tartare. Kane is impressed. Bryan starts yelling.
- World Champion Sheamus slips on a puddle, which is also Dean Ambrose. Ziggler walks by him and shrugs before leaving.
- Back at Morimoto, Kane and Bryan take turns yelling "I AM THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS" when the bill comes. Harold, who is eating next to them, comes over to say hi and gets chokeslammed onto Morimoto's tuna tartare. The Iron Chef Judges give it an aggregate of 15 for plating.
- Brodus Clay comes out and is immediately attacked by Dolph Ziggler, who cashes in his briefcase on Clay. He wins the match and announces that he used his contract to lay claim to the Funkadactyls. Vickie Guerrero turns to Dean Ambrose for consolation.
- MAIN EVENT TIME: Aces and Eights comes down and beats everybody up, forcing both Randy Orton and CM Punk to wear pants. The end.
Hope you enjoy your viewing Friday.
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