The Wrestling Blog's OFFICIAL Best in the World Rankings: January 28th

Bryan, doin' work in the Rumble match
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list:

1. Daniel Bryan (Last Week: 1) - He and Kane once again climbed Mount Friendship, but Bryan was the one who knew that not even friendship could be an excuse for eliminating Kane from the Royal Rumble match. A cunning strategist, indeed.

2. Rachel Summerlyn (Last Week: 2) - This is a programming note that Summerlyn will be on the podcast tomorrow night because she generally kicks ass and is super nice, even to blogger folk such as myself.

3. Chris Jericho (Last Week: Not Ranked) - C'mon, how can you NOT put Jericho on here after his big surprise return last night? Also, for this.

4. Pizza (Last Week: 5) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED ENTRY - I ate some really goddamn good pizza last night during the Rumble. IT was a plain cheese pizza, but I put sriracha on it and of course it was divine. I'm telling you, sriracha + pizza = MOUTH HAPPY FUN TIME EATING SONG

5. Ricardo Rodriguez (Last Week: Not Ranked) - He took his sunglasses from Bret Hart as a mission from God (or at least Canada). He did his duty well, taking massive bullets for Alberto del Rio AND being the crucial support in helping El Patron keep the World Championship.

6. LeBron James (Last Week: Not Ranked) - I know, I know, but c'mon, even I can't hate on a guy who did this for a fan who just hit a halfcourt shot.

7. Sara del Rey (Last Week: 6) - I had to dock her a spot because there were no women in the Rumble or on the telecast. However, I am considering that this was a lesson in "discretion is the better part of valor." I trust del Rey.

8. Joseph Park (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Aside from Bryan and Kane, is there a more huggable guy in wrestling? NO. EXCEPT MAYBE KAITLYN. BUT SHE'S A GIRL, NOT A GUY.

9. Jennifer Lawrence (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Look, it's been a massive oversight for me to not have mentioned Lawrence by this point. I apologize.

10. Mark Henry (Last Week: 10) - MARK HENRY FACT: Mark Henry once gained 500 pounds in grade school to help make an overweight kid who was getting picked on seem less girthy in comparison. The bullies stopped making fun of him and were too afraid to pick on Henry, whose reputation as the preeminent hoss of our time preceded him even before birth (which was foretold in the Book of Vader). That's just the kind of guy Mark Henry is, people.