I Listen So You Don't Have To: Art Of Wrestling Ep. 222

Nova or Simon Dean, whatever your preference, is Cabana's guest this week
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Art Of Wrestling
Episode: 222
Run Time: 1:07:10
Guest: Simon Dean/Nova

Twitter Request Line, Vol. 98

You're really gonna call these dudes "skinny-fat," really?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman, and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag, and look for the bag to drop Thursday morning (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers!

@tholzerman thoughts on body shaming pro grap dudes i.e. calling Usos or Punk "soft" #TweetBag #OrNow
— CtrlAltDlt (@TheREALjKAM) October 27, 2014

Depends, is the fans or other wrestlers doing it? Either one is pretty terrible, especially given guys like the Usos and CM Punk in ring shape can/could go for long times without gassing or blowing up. Fans doing it is just garden variety assholery that's still accepted by a large chunk of society. It's going to be hard to get the mainstream to accept fat people, and the way that commercialism and good ol' fashioned American conservative bootstraps mythology have combined to warp everyone's sense of what a healthy body looks like, well, the agreement on what's too fat or too skinny or too untoned is never going to be agreed upon in my lifetime. My advice is if you think about body-shaming a wrestler, don't do it, especially if you're like me and have less a six pack and more a keg. As for the wrestlers doing it, they're either toadying for Vince McMahon or they're super jealous that some dudes like Punk or the Usos were able to get over despite being doughy and they with their physiques connected with the audience as well as the average Shane McMahon punch connects with its target's face.

Best Coast Bias: Lighter Than Air

Yeah, he does that
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you were to sum up the final October Main Event of 2014, you could do so easily in three words: so that happened.

It wasn't that anything horrible like last week's Game Show Ripoff Segment That Shall Not Be Named took place, or that there was a stealth two-segger TV MOTY candidate lying in wait somewhere along the course of this hour. Some episodes you get the feeling this is called Main Event because calling it the Perfectly Cromulent Wrestling Hour doesn't really have pizazz as a sellable name to audiences. (Plus, how would you fit all that on the bars next to and hanging over the TitanTron?) Yet, ironically enough, that is Main Event's primary directive especially in a Networkified era for Stamford's McMahons and associates. Even if nothing lasts about the show moments after you're done watching it, the sense of having watched some pro graps without facepalming can serve as its own form of comfort food.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: The Ross Report Ep. 37

Ross has Jason Powell on this week
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: The Ross Report
Episode: 37
Run Time: 1:36:55
Guest: Jason Powell

Pro Wrestling SKOOPZ on The Wrestling Blog: Issue 7

IS Ambrose unhappy because his mom found drugs in his Halloween bag?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Well, well, well, it's Wednesday, which means HORB FLERBMINBER is back dishing the scoops right into your faces here on The Wrestling Blog. You won't get scoops like these anywhere on the 'Net because I am the number one, no, scratch that, I AM THE NUMBER ZERO, BETTER THAN ONE SOURCE for all the hottest wrestling news, gossip, rumors, and HIPAA violations. Do you want to know the results of Hulk Hogan's latest colonoscopy before he does? YOU NEED TO BE READING ME EVERY WEEK. I don't have time for haters. I don't have time for jerks who get people of questionable moral fiber to buy followers for them. I DON'T EVEN HAVE TIME FOR MY FAMILY. That's how dedicated to mining scoops I am.

Your Midweek Links: Hell in a Cell Fallout

The complete history of this feud and more this week
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It's hump day, so here are some links to get you through the rest of the week:

Wrestling Links:

- The Best and Worst of WWE Hell in a Cell 2014 [With Spandex]

- Hell in a Cell 2014: What We Learned [SB Nation]

- WWE Hell in a Cell: Bang for Your Buck Review [Juice Make Sugar]

- The Complete History of John Cena vs. Randy Orton [Wrassle Rap]

- The Wrestling Hipster: The Five Worst Kinds of Hell in a Cell Matches [With Spandex]

WWE Gives a Look Inside the Tryout Process

Jason Shirley, former NFL player, Wu-Tang enthusiast, WWE prospect
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Wrestling traditionally has been a secretive, carny business. The only thing fans saw was what the promoters presented as the finished product. That facade of kayfabe has been eroded over the last three decades to the point where WWE has pulled the curtain back entirely in certain aspects. Tough Enough was the first peek, although no reality show is fully reality. However, the company just dropped an unadulterated, slightly filtered look into the tryout process.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 163

Austin gabs about Halloween and Ebola this week
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show
Episode: 163
Run Time: 1:21:45
Guest: None

Who's Really Responsible for Changing Minds about Intergender Wrestling?

Was Heidi Lovelace's treatment at NPWD too much? If so, who was responsible for it?
Photo Credit: Scott Finkelstein

So, Joey Ryan had a pretty interesting tweet last night:

Wrestlers who think it's weird to sell for a girl but not weird to get thrown at the ropes, bounce back & keep running forward confuse me.
— Joey Ryan (@JoeyRyanOnline) October 28, 2014

I've written about the absurdity of the Irish whip before. Funny how the most ubiquitous move in wrestling history is also its most ridiculous at heart, especially from the standpoint of "wrestling should look real all the time or else IT SUCKS." The whip is taken for granted as effective, and yet Candice LeRae, whom Ryan was obviously referring to, holding gold in Pro Wrestling Guerrilla and being one half of one of the hottest touring tag teams in the country, is picked apart with a fine-tooth comb by people who for whatever reason think that a woman's wrestling efficacy should be halved by virtue of her gender. It hasn't made sense to me since Sara del Rey was getting the same pushback for her run in Chikara. Reactions like those that Ryan and LeRae get for their act make me roll my eyes when people derisively dismiss intergender wrestling by mockingly calling any instance of it "progressive" especially when it's bad.

The Passion of the Stroud: Inspire Pro Clash at the Bash Video Review

Matthew Palmer gon' get it
Photo Credit: Kelly Kyle/Texas Anarchy

In stunning, 1080p TH Style of review. Follow @InspireProWres on Twitter to find out when its entire catalog will be available for download/purchase on Amazon.

Highlights:

• Thomas Shire utilized counters and leverage to get a cradle pin on Davey Vega in the first match
• Late entry Keith Lee outlasted the rest of the field and won the Chris Trew Dot Biz Invitational Tournament for a spot in the New Movement.
• Scotty Santiago reversed a running Air Raid Crash into a cradle pin on Mr. B, but B would have the last laugh afterwards, attacking his victorious opponent.
• Both the Great Depression and the Red Scare were arrested the night before, so they forfeited their match against the Hollywood Knives.
• As a replacement for the incarcerated team, Cherry Ramone and Delilah Doom of the New Movement stepped forward. However, despite Bradley Allen Davis being incapacitated for nearly the entire match, Steve-O Reno was able to tap out Ramone with a leg lace, thanks to some interference from Erik Shadows.
• Carson defeated Cowboy James Claxton by getting up at the count of nine on a double countout in the ring.
• In a no rules, no rope breaks match, "Showtime" Scot Summers got "Absolute" Ricky Starks to pass out in a crossface. After the match, Gabe Roach and Greg Symonds attacked Summers before Shire made the save.
• Masada defeated "Unholy" Gregory James with a powerbomb into a jackknife pin combo. Afterwards, Jeff Gant and two new wrestlers assaulted James.
• In a match to determine number one contendership for the Inspire Pro Championship, Ray Rowe defeated "Centerfold" Matthew Palmer with the Death Rowe.
• Shawn Vexx could not make the show because of emergency obligations, so ACH filled in to tag with Jojo Bravo against the Nine Inch Males of Jordan Jensen and Dirty Andy Dalton. The match ended in a disqualification when Davey Vega ran in and turned on Bravo, joining JT LaMotta's group.
• Franco D'Angelo reversed a leaping move attempt from the American Eagle into his hooked-leg spinebuster, the Silencer, for the win.
• "One Man" Mike Dell reversed a Blackout attempt from Lance Hoyt into an elbow and added a top rope elbow drop for good measure to retain the Inspire Pro Championship.

Instant Feedback: Friendship Is Toxic

Fool's gold right here, y'all
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Lacy writes the Smackdown recap on this site, and she does a damn fine job with it, especially with her chosen theme. Friendship in WWE is hard to come by and even harder to keep, and this episode of RAW was the biggest indicator. The first three segments saw friendships dissolves, alliances crumble, and even later events where friendship was perhaps begun were dubious at best.

Of course, the crumbling bonds of friendship were obvious. Randy Orton morphed into a fiery, passionate babyface for the first time in his career. Mark Henry's slow burn betrayal of Big Show finally took place. The final cutting of the tenuous cord between Paige and Alicia Fox was cut. Those happenings were boring though. People turn in wrestling all the time.

The Wrestling Blog's OFFICIAL Best in the World Rankings, October 27

OH SH...
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list:

1. Paige (Last Week: 7) - I didn't think she'd have it in her, but she broke out the Michael Mizanin Memorial Big Swing Headfirst into the Barricade on AJ Lee last night at Hell in a Cell, which cemented her in this spot at least for a week. Who cares if she didn't win...

2. AJ Lee (Last Week: 5) - Lee escaped with the Championship, of course, but even though she got her dome rocked, she was able to do so with style. Even I want to rock her new top.

3. Dean Ambrose (Last Week: Not Ranked) - The Master of Titties needed three Authority goons and BRAY WYATT HOLOGRAMS OUTTA NOWHERE to take him out of Hell in the Cell. Although I had to dock points for not following through on his promise that everyone was going to die. Bad form.

Smackdown: Friendship is Magic

Friends or enemies, these two are best when entangled
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Best Friendship History – Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins
I don't normally enjoy when Smackdown opens with a talking segment. However, I liked Dean Ambrose's opening comments on this show, as well as the ensuing interaction with Seth Rollins (though the same cannot be said for the closing segment of the show which was agonizing to sit through). Rollins gleefully cackling about how he never cared about the Shield will never stop twisting the knife in me – in a good way. I never expected him to be such an effective villain, and it's fun hating his traitorous face even while I still secretly hope that the Shield will get back together. I don't think he truly means a lot of what he says anyway.

Best Coast Bias: See Them Punked! See Them Punked!

Is this coming to a December 11 near you?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

A good friend will always stab you in the front. - Oscar Wilde

You know the old saying "it's always darkest before the dawn", yeah?

The truth of that statement has always been up for debate. Especially considering some people might counter-argue it's actually darker at the apex of the evening. And if the latter is the case, then this late October installment of NXT had the hands meeting at the 12 and getting their freak on.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Art Of Wrestling Ep. 221

The Bucks return for another episode on Art of Wrestling
Photo Credit: Scott Finkelstein

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Art Of Wrestling
Episode: 221
Run Time: 1:03:31
Guest: Chris Hero, Young Bucks

The Death of the Finisher: WWE Hell in a Cell '14 Review

OH SHI...
Photo Credit: WWE.com

In TH Style. Get the replay for only NINE-NINET...

/is shot dead by a sniper

Highlights:

• Dolph Ziggler shockingly swept the best two-out-of-three falls match against Cesaro, winning the decisive second fall with a Zig Zag.
• Nikki Bella took out her sister Brie with a Rack Attack, securing her services as a personal assistant for the next 30 days.
• The Dust Brothers retained the Tag Team Championships over the Usos when Goldust hit the Final Cut.
• John Cena defeated Randy Orton in the first of two Hell in a Cell matches with an avalanche Attitude Adjustment through a table. Cena is now the number one contender to Brock Lesnar's WWE World Heavyweight Championship.
• Sheamus retained the United States Championship by coaxing Miz to jump into a Brogue Kick.
• Rusev got Big Show to pass out in his Accolade for the victory.
• AJ Lee retained the Divas Championship with the Black Widow over Paige. 
• In a match that saw four different people interfere, Seth Rollins defeated Dean Ambrose after Bray Wyatt appeared to give Ambrose a snap uranage.

Dispatches from the Lake: Some Helpful Advice

ARE YOU READY FOR THIS TO HAPPEN YET AGAIN????
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It’s been a hot minute since I’ve sat down to watch Superstars. I’m sure you guys all missed the write ups on the show that literally no one watches except for me and a few other suckers who review it. Superstars is usually pretty inoffensive. Tonight was no different.

I’m having a hard time with WWE programming lately. I don’t know anyone who isn’t. The lack of coherent thought and just overall laziness is really starting to bother me. I’ve been arguing with myself about whether or not to keep the Network or not. I mean, I ultimately will. I really enjoy the back catalogue, and despite all my complaints, I do watch nearly every special event/Sunday Night Raw. I watch because I hope that we might get a glimpse of the fun and greatness that we sometimes get. I’m worried we aren’t going to get anything like that until December, which is usually when WWE decides to start kind of trying again.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 162

Austin reads a marriage proposal in his reader e-mails this week
Photo Credit : WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show Unleashed
Episode: 162
Run Time: 1:17:44
Guest: None

Twitter Request Line, Vol. 97

Halloween JACKPOT
Photo via Eat Run Brit blog

It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman, and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag, and look for the bag to drop Thursday morning (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers!

@tholzerman Best and worst halloween candy to give?
— bd (@IHatebd) October 22, 2014

The objective best Halloween candy to give isn't a kind of candy, but it's the serving size. Any house that gives out full-size candy bars is doing the work of the Lord, if the Lord had a vested interest in the propagation and success of diabetes medication. But disregarding future health concerns, getting that full-size bar was always the holy grail for trick-or-treaters. Subjectively, I've always found you can't have enough chocolate-covered peanut butter candy in your bag. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups were almost currency for how valuable and delicious they were.

The worst candy, beyond any shadow of a doubt, is the dreaded Necco Wafer. I'm not even sure if they exist anymore, because really, I haven't trick-or-treated myself in over 15 years, and I just started taking TJ out around the neighborhood last year. But man, houses that kept their lights off and didn't give out anything on Halloween held children in less contempt than the sick fucks who gave out Necco Wafers. Chalky and flavorless, these candies were a scourge on anyone, and the sad kid who bit into one thinking he or she was getting an oversized roll of Smarties always will recount that moment as the worst in his or her Halloween history.

Best Coast Bias: Soft Cell

The closer managed to somewhat mitigate the train wreck of an opener, but not enough
Photo Credit: WWE.com

The opening segment died on its way back to its home planet now let us never speak of it again.

As for the rest of the Main Event? Well, at least nothing else was so bad Michael Cole could do everything short of bring a gong out from under the table and bang it while railing against how horrible what was happening in the ring was and be correct whilst doing it. The signature that closed out the show was a rubber match of sorts between Jack Swagger and Seth Rollins, both men seemingly eerily familiar in a match that like most of their previous encounters in their battles went to the self-proclaimed Architect and current golden briefcase holder. There was a fine bit of foreshadowing in the opening chunk via a (we don't like you if you're) Mexican standoff between the match participants, Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury, and Unkie Zeb on the floor.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: The Ross Report Ep. 36

Madden is Ross' guest this week
Photo Credit: Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: The Ross Report
Episode: 36
Run Time: 1:52:16
Guest: Mark Madden

Pro Wrestling SKOOPZ on The Wrestling Blog: Issue 6

What is CM Punk's current mood?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It's me, it's me, it's that miner of ESS-SEE-DOUBLE OH-PEE-ESS, Horb Flerbminber BACK with the juiciest news, the hottest gossip, the steamiest rumors, and the most molten TAKES in all pro wrestling. If you're one of the many people reading this every week, you know you're getting the BEST in wrestling news around. If you're not reading FUCK YOU unless you decide to read. I don't know why anyone would want to DENY themselves the best and most informative thing they'd ever read in their sorry lives, but here we are. These scoops SAVE LIVES. In fact, the reason why ebola has only killed ONE person in America is because reading PRO WRESTLING SKOOPZ has been proven by medical science to be a vaccination against the disease.

Your Midweek Links: Who's Your Favorite?

Was Bryan Twitter's favorite wrestler?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It's hump day, so here are some links to get you through the rest of the week:

Wrestling Links:

- Twitter's Favorite Wrestlers: A Very Scientific Poll [Medium]

- Ten Planned WWE Title Switches That Never Happened [Camel Clutch Blog]

- The Merch Table: The King of Swag-Style, Shinsuke Nakamura [Wrestling on Earth]

- The Best and Worst of RAW: Katie Vick Now Available in TV-PG [With Spandex]

- NXT Report Card, Part One: The Brand's Successes and Failures [Wrassle Rap]

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 161

Austin took calls in his latest episode
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show
Episode: 161
Run Time: 1:23:27
Guest: None

Dispatches from the Lake: The Once Proud Intercontinental Championship

What the hell happened to you, IC Title?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Fourth of July, 2011. The place? Chicago. The time? No idea. I was floating in a pool with a beer in my hand, future husband at my side, and chatting with some friends about wrestling. These gents were roommates with my dearest friend, and had made the mistake of mentioning they liked wrestling once when we were hanging out. For the previous few years, I had only my cousin to chat with about it, so having some new folks to discuss the ridiculousness with was great. I didn’t watch religiously, but knew enough about what was going on at the moment that I could have a conversation about it.

The topic of conversation that day was CM Punk and the pipe bomb that pulled so many of us back into the wrestling fold. Excited and a little drunk, we all decided that we would attend the upcoming Money in the Bank pay-per-view to see Punk challenge John Cena for the title.

I Listen So You Don't Have So: Steve Austin Show Ep. 160

Austin gives play-by-play analysis on this classic match
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show Unleashed
Episode: 160
Run Time: 1:06:12
Guest: None

Instant Feedback: Tropes vs. Wrestlers

Dammit, don't make Ambrose into just another guy
Photo Credit: WWE.com

In terms of narrative direction, WWE does one thing exceedingly well. This company knows how to turn its hottest wrestlers into "just another guy." The altar to its top star, whether it be John Cena or one of his forefathers, is soaked with the blood of up and comers who dared demand room made at the top. Sometimes, those wrestlers make it to the top of the food chain, but they never make it the same. They always lose something, because they have to make it on WWE's terms, not their own. Whether it be Ricky Steamboat or CM Punk or anyone in between who had a flicker of a spark, the WWE machine uncannily was able to grind them down into a fine paste before they were able to be rehydrated. The notable exception was Steve Austin, who made it because the company was lagging behind another, and because he hit so big, every character going forward had to be something like him.

The Wrestling Blog's OFFICIAL Best in the World Rankings, October 20

YOU NEVER GO FULL MEMPHIS, NICOLE
Photo Credit: @IchibanDrunk

Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list:

1. Nicole Matthews (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Matthews unexpectedly won the SHIMMER World Championship this past weekend thanks to a timely fireball to the face of Madison Eagles to get the deciding pin in the four way title match. Matthews has been, no pun intended, on fire this year with her second big title win, as she's also the reigning and defending Elite Canadian Championship Wrestling Champion too. Some say that getting the title with shenanigans is cheap, but I say if you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'. Ninjas reign supreme, y'all.

2. Madison Eagles (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Of course, Eagles, a former SHIMMER Champion as well, has a legitimate gripe over being scorched in the face. Then again, being a native of Australia, the fire couldn't have been that much of an obstacle for the Punisher. Grabbing the morning mail is an activity where the average Aussie risks life and limb. Ficus plants are marginally deadly on the Continent Down Under. I'm sure she'll rebound just finely after taking a fireball to the face.

3. Filet Mignon (Last Week: Not Ranked) OFFICIAL HOLZERMAN HUNGERS SPONSORED RANKING - Anyone who says this cut of meat has no flavor has had it prepared wrong for them their whole lives. The king of steaks.

Best Coast Bias: Reedemable At The Pay Window

This here what you call redemption
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Coming up Thursday at 9 pm EST on Stamford New Classics, the Sami Zayn Redemption.

As opaque as things have been between himself and his friend frenemy friend for now at least Adrian Neville in the past few weeks, Zayn's promo after Baron Corbin beat some guy so fast time may have reversed was not. (It should also be noted that Alex Riley of all people calling Sami Zayn a choker is like a Raiders fan...well, like a Raiders fan saying anything this year that isn't "Dear God, what I have done?") He didn't dodge the loss that happened in last week's main to Titus O'Neil, and said he was sick and tired of it. His eyes were still set on the prize, and as the crowd was applauding him yet again a wild Tyson Kidd emerged with an InZayn shirt on to ruin the feel-good moment. Zayn was never going to win the Big X (a bit disappointing that Sami didn't have a rejoinder to that, since Kidd is currently on the outside looking in by edict of his last lost to the Man That Gravity Forgot), and how dare he lie to the NXT Universe, the people behind TK All Day? While Zayn got a You Got Served chant going by asking if Kidd had Nattie's permission to appear, he hit right back with saying he'd rather be on Total Divas than a total loser. Eventually, it sussed out they'd renew hostilities in the main event.

RIP Ox Baker

 RIP Ox Baker
Photo Credit: Pro Wrestling Illustrated via WWE.com

Ox Baker, the pro wrestling legend known for his devastating Heart Punch, long, bushy moustache, t-shirts with ostentatious messages, and post-wrestling career in bit movie roles, has passed away. He was 80 years old. Baker's death was announced earlier this morning by Jerry Lawler on Twitter. The cause of death is unknown at this point.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Cheap Heat w/Chris Jericho

Jericho joined the boys this past episode
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Cheap Heat
Episode: Oct. 16, 2014
Run Time: 1:16:17
Guest: Chris Jericho

UT Supports UT

Photo via @QCosby17

After years of employer mandated reclusion thanks to a gimmick that required fans to believe he was a legitimate zombie automaton controlled by ashes in an urn, Undertaker has been turning up in the wild with astounding frequency in the last year or so. Just about a month ago, he participated in a fun run in Austin with Brandon Stroud, and yesterday, he was in attendance for the University of Texas' thrilling last-second win over Iowa State. Either the man is *this* close to retirement, or even he knows that the old kayfabe is dead and no one really needs to believe he's a shoot-zombie anymore. Then again, that illusion went out the window first when he came back as a biker, and second when he asked everyone to believe that he was super-serious about being a MMA-tapout artist with STRATS and FORMS.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Art Of Wrestling Ep. 220

The man who cofounded SHIMMER is on the Art of Wrestling this week
Photo Credit: Gregory Davis/Dirty Dirty Sheets

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Art Of Wrestling
Episode: 220
Run Time: 1:11:13
Guest: Dave Prazak

Twitter Request Line, Vol. 96

Why take his side in any wrestler dispute?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman, and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag, and look for the bag to drop Thursday morning (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers!

@tholzerman #TWEETBAG why do fans defend wwe corporate so much? Like shoot interviews MUST be sour grapes without any truth
— Rancho king (@rancho_king33) October 15, 2014

I notice this annoying phenomenon all the time from people who probably don't even mean to toady for a megalithic corporate entity that needs amateur quality control enforcement as much as I need a fecal transplant. However, it is not at all common to pro wrestling. How else could the Republican party run on a platform of protecting the lax taxation of the super rich and not get all out revolt from the poorest members of its voting public? It's all about promoting an atmosphere of desire and opportunity. The only thing is that instead of defending Republican brass on the slight chance that maybe you'll be rich one day, stans for the McMahon family don't really have a whole lot of personal gain that could be brought through their defense. Okay, so you're going to stick up for a monolithic corporation over someone who actually experienced the treatment behind the scenes. What's the benefit? Do these people think WWE is going to push their favorite wrestler if they defend the company in a public forum? I just don't get it either.

Best Coast Bias: We HOSS FIGHT On Tuesday Nights

A welcome renewal of hostilities
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Mae West may've once said too much of a good thing is wonderful, but she wasn't trying to book the biggest professional wrestling game in town in the 21st century, either.

At times it feels like WWE's roster is like the one rich kid in school growing up who not only had all the toys you wanted but some stuff you'd never even heard of that you didn't realize would complete your first grade life until the little sawed off brought it to Show and Tell and left chunks of your brain matter all over the desk. While this is generally great for John Cena and anybody else who ends up either in or on the front lines against the Authority, there's a lot to be desired once the absolute top shelf has been cleared.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: The Ross Report Ep. 35

The man behind this drawing and more was one of Ross' guests this week
Art Credit: Rob Schamberger

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: The Ross Report
Episode: 35
Run Time: 1:34:47
Guest: Brian Shields (29:18), Rob Schamberger (56:30)

Pro Wrestling SKOOPS on The Wrestling Blog: Issue 5

What kind of news dropped this week? FIND OUT BELOW
Photo Credit: WWE.com

Well, well, well, lookit who has returned again this week to give you all the hot NUGGETS of wrestling news that the Surgeon General DEMANDS that you have. It is I, HORB FLERBMINBER, and I am here on The Wrestling Blog spinning to you all the most pertinent news and eXXXclusive scoops that you can't find anywhere else on the 'Net. Dave Meltzer wishes he got the scoops I did. Wade Keller would eat pond scum if it meant he could fish for news like I can. WALTER CRONKITE DIED BECAUSE HE WASN'T HALF THE NEWSMAN I WAS. You are tuned into the right place at the right time for NEWS and SCOOPS.

Guest Post: Kris Travis Needs Your Help

He's got cancer. Give him a hand, alright?
Photo/Graphics via Preston City Wrestling site

Kieran Shiach is a podcast personality, certified WrestleBro, and one of the most rabid members of the English branch of the Chikarmy. You can find him on the Have a Nice Day Podcast, but with this post, he has a special plea to help out an indie wrestler in England who has recently disclosed a nasty cancer diagnosis. Note, because he is from England, all superfluous "u"s have been kept intact.

The first time I saw Kris Travis wrestle was around a year ago. As part of TIDAL Championship Wrestling’s debut tour, he teamed with Martin Kirby (known together as Project Ego) to take on Mark Haskins and Ring of Honor’s Adam Cole. When Haskins and Cole came out, the fans noticed a great similarity between the two men, and started chanting “ARE YOU TWINS?!” For the rest of the match, the crowd, the referee and all four men in the ring treated Haskins as Cole and Cole as Haskins. It was a unique, unplanned, hilarious addition to the match enabled by four skilled improvisers and great wrestlers.

Your Midweek Links: Kharma Speaks

Kharma/Amazing Kong sat down for an interview
Photo Credit: WWE.com

It's hump day, so here are some links to get you through the rest of the week:

Wrestling Links:

- The Only Way Is Suplex Interviews Kharma [Part 1|Part 2]

- The Best and Worst of RAW: Chrisley Knows Best and Worst [With Spandex]

- WWE Reportedly Announces 40 Man Rumble, Here Are Five Predictions [Wrassle Rap]

- Ten WWE Superstars Who Had Near-Death Experiences [What Culture]

- Where's the Beast? Why No Lesnar Makes No Sense [TJR Wrestling]

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 159

Austin answers listener calls
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show
Episode: 159
Run Time: 1:11:34
Guest: None

Are the Fans the Real Heels?

Bryan is a poster boy for good guys acting bad, but is it because the fans are really bad people?
Photo Credit: WWE.com

WWE started running a bumper ad before WrestleMania, back in the halcyon days of an apparently healthy Daniel Bryan and RAWs that flowed as smoothly as a perfectly poured Guinness straight from draught. It flashed statistics of how many people producing a WWE show took, paying off with Bryan walking into the arena doing his YES! chants, only except no one was in the stands. The message was to show WWE's gratitude towards its Universe by saying without the fans, said Universe didn't exist. It's a sweet message, if not one that's been relayed a bunch of times by various sports leagues and entertainment outfits. Bryan as the emissary made the most sense because he had become the essence of a folk hero, a wrestler that the kids and the jerk-ass nerds like you and me could get behind, one who seemingly united the "LET'S GO CENA" and "CENA SUCKS" crowds.

Allow Me to Introduce You to Your New Favorite Twitter Account

@TheRkoVines wants you to imagine that Jack Swagger is a dude falling off his bike here
Photo Credit: WWE.com

@TheRkoVines on Twitter

Videos of people taking pratfalls - intentional or not - have been popular for decades. For whatever reason, physical comedy is a hot seller, even when the victim doesn't really intend to spill over into personal harm. What could make the most extreme examples of falling over better? Superimposing Randy Orton giving that person his patented RKO OUT OF NOWHERE. The folks behind the RKO Vines Twitter account have given the world that gift.

Justin Roberts and Willie Mack No Longer WWE Employees

Mack's release comes shockingly before he was even given his NXT name
Photo Credit: Devin Chen

Two notable personalities are no longer employed by WWE. Both come as somewhat of a surprise, and one was released before his WWE career could even really begin. Justin Roberts, longtime ring announcer for the company whose most famous moment came when Daniel Bryan choked him with his own tie at the formation of the Nexus in 2010 (and of course he had a great sense of humor about the whole thing), was quietly let go after RAW last night. He wasn't fired per se, but his contract was not renewed. Roberts' release leaves WWE with an all-woman slate of ring announcers in Lilian Garcia, Eden Rhodes, and Jojo Offerman of Total Divas fame. I expect Roberts not to be out of work for long, as Booker T's Reality of Wrestling seems to scoop up WWE alumni on the reg. Roberts is also pretty plugged into the independent scene, as he's been a frequent visitor to Arizona's International Wrestling Federation.

Inspire Pro Wrestling's Battle Wars Review

Just look at these handsome dudes
Photo Credit: Samantha Dupin

It’s been a week from the time Battle Wars took place and me sitting down to write this review and I’m still buzzing from it. I’ve been in such a great mood all week, just because of this silly little wrestling show. It’s almost pathetic how happy Inspire Pro makes me. I tweeted after the event that, excluding my wife, nothing brings me as much joy as Inspire Pro does. I look forward to it every month, which is why I hate it when they take those occasional months off.

It’s also why I’m dropping the $195 per ticket to attend Fun Fun Fun Fest in November, as they will be holding shows all three days of the outdoor festival (yes, another outdoor festival in Austin). We actually went last year and had a blast and we had initially planned to attend on Sunday only, as it has all the comedy we wanted to see. Once it was announced Inspire Pro was going to be there? Yeah, that’s something I’ll lay down some serious cash for (of course, there’s awesome music, comedy, and other such things to see as well).

Ordinarily, with a show this good, I would have written about it on the way home while driving, just to get all my thoughts out there. Instead, I just let the happy memories marinate in my brain all week, helping me get through any trying patches at work and the like. And so I sat down on this night and find myself unable to truly put into words my thoughts and feelings on Battle Wars.

Inspire Pro Wrestling is a live experience. You need to be in attendance for these shows to truly appreciate it, I think. That’s not to say you won’t enjoy the hell out of watching this show (or any of the past ones) on DVD or YouTube, because you will. The shows are phenomenal. It would be impossible to hate them. I’ve just never seen any through that means, so I can’t say how everything comes across through a filter.

You need to see, hear, and feel Inspire Pro in person.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Art Of Wrestling Ep. 219

The Franchise is Cabana's latest guest
Photo Credit: WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Art Of Wrestling
Episode: 219
Run Time: 1:10:25
Guest: Shane Douglas

Instant Feedback: The Narrative Direction

Not even Ambrose could save RAW tonight
Photo Credit: WWE.com

WWE did the unthinkable; the company made a show centered around Dean Ambrose lose its sense of wilderness. Ambrose has been WWE's most valuable personality since he was jettisoned out of the comfy walls of The Shield, and even mediocre material has been gilded in his clutch. Of course, RAW can't maintain the same energy every week. Even Ambrose needs time to recharge. However, blaming the show's lack of energy on Ambrose having an off week would be ignoring the flaws in the narrative direction that he is required to defy on a weekly basis. When Ambrose just can't put on a transformative effort, the bottom collapses under the unbearable loads placed upon it by Vince McMahon and his creative staff.

The Wrestling Blog's OFFICIAL Best in the World Rankings, October 13

Allen was even able to make Sweet Saraya's nickname unironic
Photo via @SarayaKnight

Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list:

1. Stewart Allen (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Stewart Allen passed away this weekend due to complications from an unknown-as-of-now disease that was more than likely lymphoma. He was the co-founder of and a writer for Ring Belles, a site which I count among the Friends of the Blog. His final tweet, sadly enough, was a message of solidarity to Kris Travis, a British indie wrestler who recently disclosed that he has stomach cancer. Allen's passing is a major blow to the wrestling world, as he was beloved among those who knew and read him. It's also a reminder that cancer is a real motherfucker of a disease. Karl Stern, writer and podcaster for the Wrestling Observer site is also afflicted, as is the legendary Jake "The Snake" Roberts. The disease claimed so many people who are dear to me, dear to you, and dear to the wrestling industry from John Tenta and Jumbo Tsuruta to Giant Baba and Vincent J. McMahon. Cancer sucks, and that's why defeating it in all forms should be a major priority for everyone. Donate to reputable charities, and give comfort to those who suffer from it. A kind word can go a long way for a sufferer's psyche, even if it doesn't kill a single cancer cell. In the meantime, I offer my sincerest condolences to Allen's family and friends. May he rest in peace.

2. Paige (Last Week: 2) - Paige and Alicia Fox continue to get that synergy going, although Fox didn't break out the Surge this week. I wonder if Tony Schiavone has cut them off. He has gone a bit mad with power since President Obama named him Secretary of '90s Beverages.

3. AJ Lee (Last Week: 3) - I don't blame Lee for taking off on Emma. I mean, she does put off the "Hey, wasn't high school just the best times of our lives" vibe, and no one wants to hang around someone most likely to quote and emulate Matthew McConaughey's character from Dazed and Confused.

Best Coast Bias: Not Selling Woof Tickets

SURPRISE!
Photo Credit: WWE.com

For the NXT aficionado, it was another week of swimming in the gray and hoping that there was going to be light at the end of the journey. It's not that the trip is unpleasant; rather, the inverse. There's a pair of tracks that are on display and either can be the route that leads the developmental league into 2015. But either way, the same question that first reared its head at Fatal 4 Way: who's going to end up being the heel - Adrian Neville or Sami Zayn?

Leaving aside the wild card yet tempting possibility that neither one of them will be corrupted by the Big X, another domino towards the end game went down just like Sami did to Titus O'Neil in the main event. The cursor didn't stutter; you saw that correctly.

Smackdown: Friendship is Magic

Team Teddy! Team Johnny! TEAM ANNIVERSARY!
Photo Credit: WWE.com

This episode was the 15th anniversary of Smackdown, but it was a pretty lacklustre celebration. Nothing had much to do with the history of Smackdown, other than the Team Teddy vs. Team Johnny match to decide who was the greatest General Manager. And clearly no thought was even put into that, because Booker T only showed up to be on commentary during the match and Vickie Guerrero (obviously the greatest GM) wasn't even there. (Ed. Note - She was invited but declined.) Not to mention the fact that, thrilled as I was to see John Laurinaitis, his crack executive team of David Otunga and Eve Torres was nowhere to be found, which was disappointing.

The Rock showed up, but just to do a backstage bit with Triple H. And there were a bunch of video packages cycling through some Smackdown events of note, but other than that...nothing. At first I was kind of bummed, because I'm used to RAW taking any excuse possible to have huge blowouts. However, then I remembered that I always find RAW anniversaries to be pretty fucking obnoxious. So good for you, humble Smackdown. Some might say that the lack of hoopla was due to no one giving a flying fig about you, but I know it's because you prefer to keep things low-key. This is why we're such good pals.

I Listen So You Don't Have To: Steve Austin Show Ep. 158

Austin's most recent Unleashed episode is low-key
Photo Credit WWE.com

If you're new, here's the rundown: I listen to a handful of wrestling podcasts each week. Too many, probably, though certainly not all of them. In the interest of saving you time — in case you have the restraint to skip certain episodes — the plan is to give the bare bones of a given show and let you decide if it’s worth investing the time to hear the whole thing. There are better wrestling podcasts out there, of course, but these are the ones in my regular rotation that I feel best fit the category of hit or miss. If I can save other folks some time, I'm happy to do so.

Show: Steve Austin Show Unleashed
Episode: 158
Run Time: 1:13:42
Guest: Kristin Austin, Ted Fowler